I have mourned that mom. The one that lives with me, looks like my mom.
I'm tired of the noises she makes with her mouth and teeth. The picking at her clothes.
The Kleenex everywhere.
$hit on the toilet and the floor.
I'm just tired of it all. She has lived with us 14 years.
I'm ready. Is this awful to say? I'm ready for her to pass. She's 91.
One of the behaviors that certainly justifies placement is filth in your home that she puts there and you have to clean up. It is not safe to expose your household to feces. It's a health hazard. Feces spread disease.
I don't know why you haven't placed her before. If you made one of those promises that "Mommy, I'll never throw you in a nursing home," break it. Nursing homes are where some people need to be for their own betterment. If you don't know how to get her out of your house, enlist the help of her doctor and social services.
You don't have to do this. Good luck with moving on.
PS: She could live another 10 years. People do.
PS Again: I hoped and prayed that my mom would die when she was lingering with dementia. Her condition was horrible. She wanted to die. But she lived to 95. You need to place your mom so she isn't with you for the next hundred or more years. Seriously.