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" she's basically complete dependent on other people. Those people are me, and her 90yo mother."

What does your grandmother do for her?
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JakeyJake May 2021
Luckily, just basic maintenance, I try to help them both as much as I can. She helps with the toilet visits, and I sometimes take a walk and she helps her drink etc. My Grandma is arguably tough gal, and she's not the fan of the situation (technically she's the one who should be taken care of, even though she doesn't need much), but she really does her best.
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It sounds like mother is preferring to live in denial and finding justification for her fears of confronting the reality - changes and equipment make it all undeniably real.
And what if you sustain an injury and can no longer assist?
As a religiously devoted person, I think your mother should be showing more regard for the 'living angel' tending her needs while awaiting her anticipated miracle.
Stand firm for the tools you require.
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JakeyJake May 2021
Jackpot, that denial. I appreciate how you said that, I'll probably use that in some form. Thank you!
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You have to set up boundaries to protect your mental and emotional self. Maybe those boundaries include deferring the caregiving to someone else, a hired aid? If she doesn't like this thought then you have a negotiating tool for her to make changes in her home that make providing care by you easier for YOU and your grandmother (who, I'm assuming will eventually need someone to care for her as well).

As far as her spiritual belief that having "enough faith" is the only precursor to divine healing: ask her why Paul the Apostle was allowed to suffer with the "thorn in his side" (from some sort of illness or disease) all the while he was evangelizing and discipling? And not to mention all the physical persecutions he endured (like whippings, etc.)? Is she saying even he didn't have enough faith? If so then there's no hope for the rest of us believers.

2 Cor 12:7-10 (Paul writing to the church in Corinth)
"Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh... Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

I hope this helps. Welcome to the forum!
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JakeyJake May 2021
The thing with her healing is that she was recommended some "Christian healer" on YouTube, who basically says that illness is Satan's and healing is God's, so it's absurd at times. I didn't know what she was watching and when I realized it was a bit too late... That said, I appreciate your advice and I'll definitely remember those verses.
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Tough love? It's going to be hard to set firm boundaries when she lays on the fear, obligation and guilt, but if she won't change then you have to. Tell her the changes are for you, not for her. And then if she still won't allow them let her live with the consequences; don't continue to care for her in any way that you find physically compromising. And please arrange to have outside caregivers to give you some respite as well, your mental health is just as important as your physical health.
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JakeyJake May 2021
Thank you. Yes, I actually was hoping for this answer, but I was always afraid that my "tough love" will be considered basically flipping her off, but I now start to see that it may be just the opposite. Thank you again. 🙂
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