I feel she’s too frail to handle it. She’s 80 and in very poor health. She’s unable to get out of chair. Doesn’t cook, do laundry, or anything. She’s unable to bathe without assistance. Sits in urine and stool until we change her and doesn’t even notice. Any thoughts on how it would benefit her? Her quality of life is not good.
2 things to know.
1. She would probably be considered Hospice eligible due to the dementia.
2. She wold be considered Hospice eligible due to declining dialysis treatment.
If she goes on Hospice because of the dementia you can later decide to try dialysis and she could remain on Hospice. On the other hand if she enters Hospice because she is declining dialysis if you later decide to try it she would not be eligible for Hospice (they could change the diagnosis to dementia though)
Personally if her quality of life is not good if it were me I would elect to NOT do dialysis and go on Hospice and let them help me manage any pain or discomfort I may have.
There are many advantages to having Hospice.
She/you will have a Nurse that will come at least 1 time a week to check on her. A CNA at least 2 times a week to help bathe and dress her as well as order supplies.
You will have medications delivered to you as well as other supplies.
If equipment is needed that will be delivered to you as well.
Honestly I can not see a downside to going on Hospice.
There are 2 types. One is a For Profit the other is Not for Profit. The Hospice I used for my Husband was a Not for Profit and I could not have been more pleased. The goal was patient focused not saving or making money.
About a year ago, I was faced with a similar situation. My father required surgical intervention for a heart condition. We decided against it and contacted our local hospices as Grandma1954 suggested. It’s been a good decision for us. It’s given him quality of life and I don’t believe the surgery would have given him quality or quantity. As you said, I don’t think he could’ve handled it.
No matter what you decide, I wish you peace and comfort. I understand how tough this is.
What you and your family have to decide is it going to improve her other health issues? Dialysis is very hard on a person and you are looking at several times a week, each time takes hours. The chances of her pulling the needles out are high if she has dementia. I know we all want our loved ones to live forever, but a some point we need to protect them from medicinal treatments that will do more harm than good.
The option is to do nothing and putting Mom on Hospice. Eventually the Toxins will make her septic and she will pass. So sorry that u need to make this decision.
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