Follow
Share
Read More
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
1 2 3
I had to make the same decision. Won't bore you with the details but tried place #1 and then moved her to #2.

It is a long drive for me every day but nicer her for her.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Please, please choose #2. It will allow you to not think about her care 24/7. When you are questioning, the care, she would be getting this thought that will leave your mind. That will drive you crazy. I chose a nursing home 4 hours away. Why.....far better employees, food, activities and a happy group of residents. Residents feelings are very important. They reflect how the home treats them. Being surrounded by happy employees and residents your reduced visits will not be missed.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

I'm in a similar situation except my dad is currently in a facility which was recommended by his long time social worker which isn't horrible but the care is subpar just because the place is severely understaffed. I have a rapport with most of them and I visit every day, mainly because of what I just mentioned and, my dad has early on-set dementia and with the care concerns I feel better being as visible as possible. I've thought about moving him, but have no idea where to begin but also know it will be further and will definitely put stress on me and limit my visits (my mom has colon cancer and I help her at home even though she's very active for her age & considering the cancer).

I agree, visit place #2, have a meal and talk to some families if you can (maybe visit on a wknd so you can catch more ppl). If the care is that much more superior and it will make a difference to your mom then it's worth considering. Good luck!
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Will you feel guilty about not visiting? Will you feel guilty for not having her in the better place? To me, the answer to those questions should help control your decision. If the place that is closer is not providing substandard care, than that is a perfectly reasonable choice. Don't go for "better" if you are to be guilt stricken by not visiting.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Take the better place and visit less often. We put mthr up in a memory care which has a great reputation for care, but is further. The other one is more expensive and beside a very fancy country club, so it's the "in" place to use but simply has too few employees to take care of all those seniors. Go for the better place and maintain your identity!
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

So, I ran into our county's Chief Medical Director in the hall so I asked him about the two facilities and, oh, the face he made at the mention of facility #1... He basically said only put her there if you are going to visit every day to keep an eye on them.

BTW, I forgot to mention in my earlier post that Mom had two stays in #1 two years ago and it wasn't a bad place but it has changed management and her last stay there in January of this year was vastly different from her other stays. The place ahs gone down hill.

I am sure that right now, Mom is not in a position to weigh in on the issue so I am trying to go by how I would feel if I were the one who was going to be in-patient. While I think visits are important to her, I am leaning toward the better place.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I'm kind of having to make a similar decision for my parents.. closer for me or a slightly better facility.

If I were you I would visit facility number 2 before making any decisions. Have a meal there and see what the ambiance is like. Would it make a difference for your mom?

I think I would choose the facility with the superior care and the less dreary facility... even if it were a little farther to drive. You have to think about yourself as well. would you want to go to a dreary facility every day?

Maybe if you have a superior facility you may only need to go twice a week or so?
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

1 2 3
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter