My brother knew what the will stated yet he said that my mother "told "
him to take all the money. He was the power of attorney, trustee of a Medicaid trust and the executor. He feels entitled to it because he provided most of the care to my parents since he lives in the same state.
I believe the attorney told him to put my name on any accounts, but he did not. I am really struggling with this because it was a lot of money.
I really prefer not to sue him because he is my brother, suing will be costly and I do't know if time has run out in terms of my ability to sue him.
I live in New York, if that helps. Thanks for listening.
My brother helped my parents as he lived in the same town as them and I live one and one half hours way. My parents had 2 full time aides. As Power Of Attorney in New York I know that a rider could have been added giving my brother the ability to "gift" himself money. I am not sure if there was a rider. Obviously he knows that is part of my inheritance . In fact we sat with the attorney when the Will was initially discussed. I glanced at the POA at one point and there was no mention of an amount of $ that he could get as a POA.
There was no caregiver contract because he did not give the physical care. He helped with paying the bills, etc which is why he was put on my parents' accounts initially.
There was also a "Pooled Medicaid Trust" and he was the Trustee for that . I offered to help with that but he did not want me to do so. I was the Successor POA and SUCCESSOR TRUSTEE (of the Irrevocable Medicaid Trust). When my mom supposedly told him to "take the money" she had dementia and my father was depressed. I know that heresay means nothin in court.
TY for you help.
I think about this everyday, how despicable his actions have been. We call each other about things regarding the apt and he acts as if he has done no wrong. Talks to me about his plans for the day, etc.
By the way. My mom had 2 full time aides. My brother helped out by paying bills , dealing with the home care agency if there was a problem with getting aides, etc. I offered to help where I could but for the most part he refused. We both live in the same state. I live an hour and one half away (I made an error in my initial question as we DO live in the same state).
He has been pleasant since we have not spoken about money for a few years. Soon it will come up because the apt has to be painted. etc.
My concern is that if I try to sue him (for breach of fiduciary responsibility as a P.O.W) there may be a statute of limitations in terms of when I can do this.
There appear to be a few things going on here. His POA is void now that your mother is dead. I'm guessing the Medicaid trust is a Medicaid Asset Protection Trust and that now your mother is dead the assets in the trust are to be distributed to named beneficiaries. You also mention accounts and I take that to mean Pay on Death accounts (bank checking accounts for instance) or Transfer on Death accounts. Your mother would have had to sign a document naming your brother, you, or someone else as beneficiary of a TOD or POD account. If she had any beneficiary accounts that did not name a beneficiary, the asset becomes part of her estate governed by her will. If you haven't seen your mother's last will and testament, you should be able to access it through the probate court in the city/country where she was living.
From your description, you believe your brother has breached his fiduciary duty as your mother's executor and possibly as the trustee of the trust. You can present your case to the court yourself but you'll probably be better off hiring an attorney. At the very least, the attorney can write him a letter to inform him of the laws he may have broken and what remedies you may have.
If you really want to avoid hiring an attorney, you can check to see if the probate court where the will was filed has a mediation program. You and your brother sit with a neutral third-party who gives the two of you a chance to work this out.
My brother, who is a psychologist and I should be able to try to work out our differences ourselves, however I do not know if he is willing to do so. I plan to at least speak with him to tell him how I feel about his actions so I can get it off my chest, (I do like the idea of a mediator but i hope we can work it out ourselves.).My mom only passed a few months ago and this has been an emotional journey for me.
Perhaps I can request in court that the will be probated but I don't want there to be any issues with the selling of the apt so I may even wait until that is done a number of months from now.
When he matter of factly told me he took the money 5 years my husband and I met with an attorney and said he could write a letter to my brother then . I chose not to do so because my parents ere alive, my parents would have been upset plus they could have changed the will . Interesting that my parents always talked about how important family is and this is what he does to me .
At that time my brother said, "so sue me". Once I bring up the money issue at this point I am sure that he will be floored. He probably anticipates that I was just going to let it go. My husband and I are on social security and have small pensions. My brother and his wife have plenty of money. Although we don't have a lot of money my husband says to just not give him any money for minor repairs on the apt. etc and just move on. He sees how this ordeal is affetig me. I can't let it go because what he did is wrong. I don't mind even letting him have a larger share since he was able to do more since he was physically closer to my parents, but e doid nt leave one cent to me. And before all this, we had a decent relationship.
Ty for letting me vent. Any other thoughts would be appreciated I talk to my husband about this everyday. At least he will get a break by visiting our new twin grandbabies in Florida. He hasn't seen them yet.