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In addition to the bed pads (I use Beck's Classics reusable bed pads- they work great- I keep a number of small and larger sizes on hand for change outs), I also use heavy absorbency McKesson pull ups for my mom. I keep plastic under the bottom bed sheet just in case so nothing can get through to the mattress.
If your LO doesn't have a UTI, you may want to ask the doc about AZO with Go-Less. I had to put my mom on this because she was soaking through her diaper, her pants and the bed pad, sometimes 2x per night and this was even with getting up 2-3 times each night to go and with a fluid intake limit per her doctor!
We are still waiting on answers at her next appointment as she still soaks her diaper and gets up 2-3 times per night to go, but at least it doesn't soak all the way through now- there has been a difference.
I know how frustrating this must be for you and hope you get a solution soon.
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I did not know how many mfg diapers there were.. My local place has a few brands.. and the one I chose I thought was really good, cuz the facility told me they worked...

I will look at other brands now...
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You can use Wearever briefs. They are available on Amazon. Also there are pads such as Tena, also on Amazon to go inside the breif.
I use disposable pads and washable reuseable pads. Also from Amazon. Also a plastic noiseless pad on the matress and under the bed pad is also a good way to go.
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Everyone is different, you have to remember that it's important to not lose sight of the fact that everyone receiving care is an individual. Regardless of their age, current condition, and level of ability, they're a unique individual, with their own history and experiences.
Its easy to look at those in need of assistance (especially when they're elderly) as a "class" or a group. But often times the only thing an entire facility of elderly people have in common IS the fact that they have all lost some of their autonomy.

In reality, they all have separate and unique personalities. They've all lived unique lives, have unique likes, dislikes, and not unlike those who care for them, their individual "stories" add up to make them who they are today!

With this in mind, it becomes very difficult to use sites like this one to gain advise about things like.. how to deal with someone who is struggling with incontinence and won't "do" X or Y.

The thing is, X & Y may be well-established methods of dealing with this exact problem, but you can't always apply a defined solution to a problem.. especially when said problem could likely be caused by one of a MILLION different reasons, or most likely a combination of them.

And these "reasons", are all the exact same reasons that cause us as care givers to have problems in our own lives with everything from balancing our finances, to relationship complexities, family problems.. even other internal issues that are (for the most part) out of our control, like mental illness.. personality traits.. OR.. lived experiences!

How this relates to OPs question, is this.. this gentleman may be struggling with incontinence products for a HUGE number of reasons, ranging from simple pride and embarrassment.. to technical difficulties with the products themselves causing physical or emotional distress.. or it could also stem from the person's own life experiences as well. We all have stories from varying points in our lives that involve diapers, weather it be from childhood, when we remember wetting the bed as a child or adolescent, and being embarrassed by our mother hanging freshly laundered diapers and plastic pants on the clothes line for the entire neighborhood to see! Or it could be from our adolescent years, when we witnessed an elderly loved one (grammie or grampee) in their final years when we watched them devolve into a totally helpless, and vulnerable shell of their former self, and we had to watch someone we once viewed as strong and invincible lose control of their bowel or bladder, and we remember how the adults around us reacted when Grammy wasn't around. We may have witnessed our mother, father, aunt's, uncle's, describe Grammys recent incontinence incident, and we heard them casually complain about how terrible it was, and how it's time to "put them in diapers".

All of these things affect us, and come to the surface to affect how WE may react to the situation where we ourselves start losing control over our bodily function.

So its important to approach each situation with the affected person, and to help them help YOU understand the problems and issues they're having, and to help make them feel comfortable talking to us about their individual experience, offer our support, and help work WITH them to come up with a solution that will work for them while still helping them maintain their dignity and as much autonomy as humanly possible in the process.

When my grandmother got to that point, I simply provided her with a wide range of products, and told her that they were there for her if she felt like she wanted to use them, and I told her that I would gladly explain how to use any of them or to help her with them if she wanted me to.

But the important part was I made her feel like SHE was in control of finding a solution that worked for her, and I did my best to make her feel like she was part of the process.. and I was merely just here to support her if she needed it.
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