How do you know when you are truly becoming a basket case as a caregiver? What are the physical signs you notice?
For me, it is............easy tears...........heart pounding in my chest..........can't complete a task (that's partly due to constant interruptions of caregiving).....
How about you?
I am now taking care of his mother in my house but it's very different. I loved him so much. I feel bad about MIL but am not close to her - never was. I don't understand why I am reacting this way because my relationship to her is distant and not remotely in the same classification as relationship with my husband. So why am I getting this numb feeling all over?
Along with the heart pounding, and feeling light headed and that is just when the phone is ringing and I see my parent's number on Caller ID.
And now I feel like I am having issues with my own memory... but the doctor reassured me it is a symptom of stress.
in my mothers final months i would get a muscle twitch in the back of my neck when id get stressed . hospice nurses were a real pain . because i didnt smile and act pretentious they decided i was unfriendly or judgemental . not at all , they were the professionals and i respected their opinions . i dont know what to tell them . when i smile its to uncover my teeth so i can take somebody ' s throat out ..
losers ....
Dread
Short with everybody
Resentment
Anger
Tired
Eating my feelings
All I want to do is sleep, but have horrific insomnia at the same time
Forgetful
Not interested in my dearest hobbies
No desire to go out
Feeling like I can't enjoy anything even if I wanted to
Despair
Weight gain
My skin breaks out
My scalp gets itchy
Queasy & diarrhea
Can't make decisions
General dissatisfaction with pretty much everything
I come to this site for encouragement, support, or honestly - to read about other far worse situations than mine.
When you can't get away from the stressor, stress only goes up, up, up.
It takes me 3 days to relax on a vacation under non-stressful times, so when there are no vacations and no place to even pretent to unwind, it's bad.
I try to be conscious of what I'm eating and if it's emotional eating. Sometimes I have that donut anyway, but I am accepting the consequences of an emotional doughnut.
Some people will say get more exercise because it really does help, but it can be hard to do when you are figuratively chained to the person needing care.
It does help burn off stress hormones though.
I force myself to breathe deeply and slowly and do some anti-anxiety meditations.
I temporarily let go of unnecessary things. Like dusting, or non-essential housework. When I feel better, I'll get back to it. I can promise that no dignitaries or press will be visiting my home, and it's not up for Better Homes & Gardens photo shoot, so a short lapse in straightening and polishing will be OK.
Sometimes I'll use a sick day at work to be in the house alone with the cats. I sleep until I wake up, dress in my polar fleece pants and just do what seems either relaxing or enjoyable. Take naps. Drink wine.
It's getting better when I can think about better ways to deal with a situation or prep myself for next time without falling down the well again.
I had to stop shopping therapy. That's fun, but I shopped for yarn, and I have more fancy yarn than I will be able to knit, so I just go pet my yarn stash now.