My father is 90 and is in late stage of Alzheimer’s/Parkinson’s. I have taken care of him with the help of private caregivers for the past year and a half. My bro comes once a week to visit for an hour. (upset my dad chose me DPOA). Trying to abide by my father’s wishes to remain home, I have been through NUMEROUS caregivers but they don’t want to stay because he can be combative at times because of frustration that he cannot do things on his own. No matter how much I train CG as to how to approach him with care and his likes and dislikes, they are more concerned with being on cell rather than a companion to him. Now my brother is trying to convince me to place my dad in memory care which I agreed to only as RESPITE RESIDENT for 30 days for me to see how he acclimates. Otherwise he returns home! My father’s net worth is pretty substantial. My father created a Will at the same time he signed DPOA. But he did not create an Irrevocable Living Trust to protect assets which brings me to my question. As DPOA can I create one in his name? If so, does it need to be done prior to admittance?
You should contact a lawyer to discuss your duties as your Father's LEGAL Fiduciary under the specific written things in the DPOA. You have many obligations, especially in record keeping, as well as rights to act in your father's behalf. His funds pay for you to see the Lawyer as his POA.
As you describe the situation I think that your brother is correct, and your father's funds should now be used to give him as safe, as comfortable and as secure living conditions as he is able to have given his condition.
I am so sorry for all your woes.
Do try to cooperate with your sibling (s?) in the care of your father in his last days as you do not want this to come to a war over guardianship which would override your POA. Often in cases of siblings at war the court will take the care of an elder completely out of the hands of a family fighting over him, and will assign a court appointed Fiduciary to place the person and manage the finances until death, at which point the person named as the executor of will or successor trustee of the trusts will take over management and distribution.
In legal cases it is always best to consult legal advice in your own state.
How are titles in his assets vested? I think the important thing is that they're available for his care, including any placement. What kind of assets are in question? Can you draw down on them for placement through the DPOA, which I think would be the important issue now and in the future?
Why do you feel an IRT is appropriate?
My daughter will tell you whether you are on Medicaid or private pay you are treated the same. My Mom got good care in her NH. But once she was on Medicaid she went from a 2 people room to a 4 people room. That was OK because her Dementia had worsened and she was in the common area all day only slept in her room at night. Wouldn't have been OK if she had her senses.
30 days may not be long enough for Dad to adjust. You may be asked not to come around for a couple of days or so. He needs to get used to the staff doing for him. When you start to visit, don't make it an all day think. Give yourself time to see that this is the best thing for him. He will just continue to decline as time goes on. It will be harder to care for him. You won't have to keep finding caregivers. You can enjoy him more if you aren't doing the caring and responsibilities are less. There comes a time its not what they want its what they need.
Frankly, denying him proper care so you can inherit more money isn't exactly admirable. I'm with your brother on this one.
if you were to do this, your bro can go to court to have you removed from being POA or having any signatory power for any of dads finances and getting himself appointed instead of you. By your doing something that benefits you directly from dads income & assets, it creates “self dealing” which is not proper fiduciary duty of a POA. You’d be toast on being POA. Bro would be in charge.
Heres what I’d be concerned about, if it comes accross that your disinclination to have dad go into a facility with 24/7 oversight is more about your interest in keeping his “substantial” net worth for your own future supposed inheritance, AND you balk at paying for the facility from dads $ AND you ask Bro to be paying for things for dads care, dads property or needs, that Bro will seek to have dad placed under a guardianship or conservatorship whether it’s him or a court appointed one. And it will be granted.
If dad has “substantial net worth”, forget about Medicaid eligibility.
He’s going to need to spend down his nonexempt assets to 2k to ever, EVER, be ok for LTC Medicaid in most states. Please realize even if he does a spend down from his substantial net worth & gets impoverished so he can actually file a LTC Medicaid application…… that Medicaid still does a 5 yr look back and can go to 10 if transfers are suspected. That’s a huge period of time, if dad wrote checks to you, or bro or other family members or transferred property over the decade, it will surface as he has to provide bank and financials statements and caseworker can access state database on real property. Medicaid can place a transfer penalty on his Medicaid application. & as he would need to be in a NH in order to apply for LTC Medicaid, that NH will come after you to pay his bill if he’s ineligible for Medicaid.
Having the $ to private pay gives him lots more choices as to facilities and amenities, like his own sitter or shadow at a NH. Isn’t the best he can afford what you want for him?