I have two family members on my father's side that will be coming to town soon. One of them makes comments as if I do nothing to help my father. My father has said twice that I will just have to ignore them because they like to take over as if he knows there will be trouble when they come. I hate to say this but I feel as if I'm going to be ganged up on. Years ago when they came for a visit, they threw away things that belonged to me at my father's house. I help him all that I can. His house is cleaner than mine. Has anyone else dealt with a situation like this?
A “concerned” family member debased and insulted me and leveled many accusations against me.
It took me literally YEARS to regulate my own thinking and realize that his comments ( made from a safe and cozy distance after promising to stay by LO’s side, then quickly leaving me to do the full time care) were both baseless AND POINTLESS, since he was in all practical sense “out of the picture”.
I’m a decent honest GROWN UP, and ultimately, I began thinking like one.
You can too. If you need to, write down and make a list of what the bullies have done.
Then make a list of what YOU DO EVERY DAY.
Then pour yourself a cool drink, and do EXACTLY what your father has said to do.
NOTHING THAT THEY SAY can do you any real harm and both you and your father know that.
Be grateful that they are VISITING, and will be LEAVING.
For some caregivers, the day the “helpers” depart is better than the best holiday of the year.
It ALWAYS WAS FOR ME. Enjoy it!!!!!
Seems your Dad knows what you do and is telling you ignore them. Maybe you can use a little truth said in jest. Yes, lock ur room and you may want to tell them, you don't answer to them.
Yes, I did have an Aunt like that, we ignored her.
These people are not worth fretting over. Accept that you don’t have the power to change their opinions. Chalk it up to ignorance on their part.
Generally, people who think they know everything usually don’t have a clue as to what you are experiencing in your daily life.
Wishing you peace as you continue on in your caregiving journey.