Follow
Share

My sister is POA and Trustee of our parents, 86 and 88 yrs old. I noticed 3 withdrawals from Dad's IRA totaling over $11,000 being deposited into an account not owned by my parents. Sister's first reaction was fear of being arrested, then her reason was she had to pay taxes and now she is saying she gifted it to herself. Is this legal? Our parents' bills are constantly past due. Sis herself has filed bankruptcy for the third time about 10 months ago. Sis has not come up with receipts for our parents to file income taxes for 2 years now.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
No it’s not legal. And if parents need Medicaid? It will disqualify them. It’s called elder financial abuse. You can contact Adult Proective Services in their area, but will your parents protect her and say that they approved? How tragic.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

NO
the trustee has a extremely high amount of loyalty only to beneficiary (s)
called Fiduciary Responsibility.

I may or may not be stating it totally correct. but I take my responsibility seriously
and this to me is NOT good

I have had to tell my sister no money ! im glad im trustee. or id be in your shoes.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

if you know the attorney for your mom and dad. the one who drew up the paperwork. I would call and notify him if possible. its POA/trustee job to file taxes. sorry this burns me up
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

my mom would probably help my sister with money. like she has for years past.
but my mom isn't in her right mind anymore.

is sister low on money because they are down on their luck. or because they constantly spend and reward themselves with expensive stuff? if they are taking money they should have at least told you. like for an emergency or something.



sorry I overreact - it just hit a nerve w me :(
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Absolutely NOT.

Sheesh, some people. Get the lawyer involved, if there is one. Maybe, if you're super nice, give her one change to return all the money. IF she won't let the attorney handle it.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

She is abusing her responsibility and needs to return it. I didn't think you could file bankruptcy numerous times anymore. I would bet the judge isn't OK with it. Its like stealing. I thought the courts were cracking down on this. Your sister needs to learn how to handle her money.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

There's another issue.

Is she the current Trustee of the Trust, or does she inherit authority on your parents' deaths, or on the death of the first of them? Are the IRAs funded (title to the IRAs) transferred to the Trust? Or are the IRAs titled individually, with specific beneficiaries named?

In other words, when she draws down on an IRA, is she taking money from the Trust or assets outside the Trust? I ask to determine if she's defrauding the Trust or your parents assets which might be outside the Trust?

But someone with legal knowledge does need to review the Trust to determine if there are provisions for her to make these kinds of payments to herself. Trustees are entitled to compensation. And she could be acting as Trustee as opposed to proxy under a POA.

Someone also first needs to be determine if these are RMDs, Required Minimum Distributions, from IRAs. They might be, and if she's depositing them in an account for the Trust, that might be legitimate. It depends on what she's using the funds for and in whose name the account is titled.

From your description of her financial problems though, there definitely is a question whether she's inappropriate using your parents funds.

How are you getting this information? Do you have access to the IRAs or your parents' accounts?
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

SIS is married to an alcoholic , gambler, cigarette smoking ASS who barely works. They are in debt due to addictions, lack of work ethics and BAD MONEY MANAGEMENT. SIS and BIL are furious with me for being the whistle blower but I am more angry with them for their inhumane treatment to our parents. SIS took Dad's credit card away a while ago (year) for her own personal use and I saw a statement saying almost $10,000. was owed on it. The last charge was at a convenient store in SIS's hometown from June. The statement said if the minimum was paid each month it would take over 20 years to pay it off, Mom and Dad and in their eighties, they will never see it paid off!!! 
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Concerned, what are you plans to address this situation? Will you be retaining an attorney? Going to the police?
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Mom doesn't want SIS to get into legal trouble. I however would love to see SIS and BIL squirm. SIS is trying to negotiate with my brother saying she will resign from POA but still wants to remain as Trustee. She can't have any power. My brother wants to maintain the family, me not so much. Mom said my brother is taking her to the lawyer tomorrow and SIS was crying all day..TOO BAD THEIF
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

she needs to resign ALL her duties. if she gets in trouble its her own doing.

make sure all bank accounts get changed over without her name.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

I was planning on running a credit check for Mom and Dad...however I am very scared on what I will find out.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Thank you all. I love this site, I am so glad I found it.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Report her to APS! Today! Forget about family ties and keeping the peace. Yes, you are likely to find out there has been way more financial exploitation by her and hubby. Sadly she will get sympathy from your mom. But you HAVE to protect whatever resources your parents have left or you will find yourself doing all the work and paying for everything yourself when the money runs out (if it hasn't already). Talk to your brother and get him 100% on your side. Who in the heck NEEDS a good relationship with a sibling who would do this to the parents? This burns me up!
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

If brother is handling it, I should let him get on with it. You ought really to have stepped in when you saw that credit card statement but it's a bit late for that now.

Whose brilliant idea was it to appoint your sister to this position in the first place? It can't have been news to anyone in the family that she and money are not a good mix?
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

The idea was Mom's. SIS and BIL drove her and Dad to the lawyers on Mom's birthday last year. Happy birthday mom now I will steal from you.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

It is not to late to address the June credit card statement. You and your brother need to contact APS and/or the police and get this financial exploitation of a vulnerable senior couple reported. Bad choices usually come with bad consequences, so here you are SIS and BIL. If your parents need financial aid in the future, just turning the other check on this could cause them to be ineligible for a period of time..

Oh yea, who would leave a thief as the Trustee? Not someone able to make good decisions , so obviously your parents have had some challenges for a while.

I personally think any person that would do this kind of thing should have the book thrown at them, this is when a chain gang would be just dues.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Update: My brother and I took Mom and Dad to lawyer and revoked SIS POA and Trustee. SIS is a maniac!! SIS is verbally abusing Mom and trying to get in Dad's head! SIS is asking Dad to give her the 2 family rental NOW and not wait til our parents die so she can inherit it. My brother walked in on the abusive scene and told SIS he will call APS is she didn't leave. SIS called brother every filthy name in the book. BIL said "I think we should get an attorney cuz we have been robbed" My brother said "I think you should call a lawyer and the police, have an investigation launched with all the financial statements exposed. My brother called lawyer and said if SIS brings dad in there to give her the property, he wanted to be called. I am sooooo afraid she will convince Dad to sign away the house now. I want to get a restraining order and brother said wait.
SIS is also claiming the missing IRA $11,000. was a gift from our parents! This is news to Mom and Dad. I say TURN HER IN!!!!!
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

your sister and BIL must want to get themselves in more trouble - even if sister was able to convince your parents to sign over anything. its just going to make her look worse. its going to make her case of being innocent laughable.
she's digging herself in deeper.

she needs to understand. no gifts. no money. no property. no nothing. not until both parents pass.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I agree with you Concerned! Call the police. I'm so sorry your family is having to go through this trauma.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

No it is NOT legal. That is called self-serving. If you are willing to take over as POA/Trustee, then see an attorney about petitioning the court to remove your SIS as POA and Trustee based on malfeasance of duty, breach of fiduciary duty. This makes me crazy angry.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

We did remove Sis as POA and today Bil took confused dad to bank to try to get dad to withdraw all his money. Bank mgr could tell dad was confused and Bil was irate. Mgr called me and I closed accounts again, opening in my name and mom and dad as beneficiaries. I am very afraid Sis will get confused dad to sign over his rental property. Help
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Does anyone have POA for dad? If sis was removed as POA, is there a successor POA/alternate who was named in his POA document? If not, you need to file an application with the court to be appointed his guardian and conservator.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

My brother and I are the new POA's for Mom and Dad as of July 9th. My Sis beat us to the bank and took all dad's money but $5. The bank said she was listed as co owner so there is nothing they could do.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I think you had better talk to APS and the police. Sooner the better. Your parents need protection.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

My parents will protect her. Sis turns on the tears around Mom and Dad and says I just want her in jail. Mom ends up feeling sorry for Sis and says no amount of money is worth this. I am so frustrated. I have to admit I would take great satisfaction seeing my brother in law in jail and my Sis cut out of the Will. I know this makes me sound bad but I can't help it, I am so shocked with all the stealing I have discovered. Dad's social security was no sooner deposited and Sis was in the bank withdrawing in while she was giving them free food from the food pantry.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Mom and Dad will protect her.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I would still get an attorney and file an APS report. If your sis was acting as POA, does that mean your parents are considered by their doctors to be incapacitated? If so, even if your parents defend her, she still clearly took advantage of two incapacitated elderly people and abused her legal authority as POA/Trustee.

A judge probably wouldn't look too kindly on a POA/Trustee exploiting elders and abusing their fiduciary responsibilities. Plus there is also the issue of your parents being subject to a Medicaid penalty because they will look at it as being a gift. A good elder law attorney can help you navigate these hurdles and see if there is anything that can be done to make your sister repay the money.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter