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End stages COPD in Indiana. My dad has around 35,000 in the bank and he's on Medicare and has end stage COPD (only 22% lung capacity left). His house needs a few big repairs but won't get them fixed for some reason, and I've tried EVERYTHING to get him to before something happens to him and he can't get to the money for any reason be it the state, the city coming to make him move out. He's 66 and has no memory of EVER living ANY place else except for the 3 years he was married to my mom. He what's left his house by his parents and he has a will at his lawyers office leaving EVERYTHING to me, as I'm an only child. I guess I just really need a checklist of things I have to get done between now and then. A time frame to do a man and all this for dummies cuz I've never done this before in my life but all my life he took care of me and now I just want to do the very best I can to take care of my Daddy. Thanks in advance y'all 😁, from Indiana

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Set up an appointment with a trust and estate attorney. (His lawyer is probably that guy.) If Dad is able to go to the lawyer's office, great. If not, most will come to you.

You need:

1. Durable power of attorney for financial matters
2. Medical power of attorney for Dad's medical decisions
3. Will (done)
4. Possibly a trust if he has any other assets beyond his $35,000 and the house.
5. Bank powers of attorney. Again, if Dad is able, go to his bank with him, have him tell them without prompting that he wants you to have power of attorney for his accounts. Banks always seem to have their own power off attorney forms and don't like the one you had legally done by an attorney, so if you can do this with Dad in tow, that's a good thing. (Even better is to have him put you on his accounts as a joint owner. When he dies, the account automatically belongs to you with no tax implications.)
6. If he has a car, if he'd agree to add you to the title, that'll make selling it much easier. Be sure the ownership is listed as "Mr. Dad" OR "JCrane," not AND, because then you have to deal with either getting his signature to sell it if he's still with us, or producing a death certificate to prove he cannot sign. If it's and OR title, either one of you can sell it without the other's signature.

DO NOT put the house in your name until after he dies. You'll get socked with huge capital gains taxes, which are taxes on the amount between what Grandma paid for that house and what you sell it for. If you inherit the house instead, you'll get what's called a stepped-up cost basis, and you'll pay no taxes if you sell within six months or so after his death.

Don't sweat the repairs on the house unless it's unsafe for him to live there. Is he likely to live long with such poor lung capacity? What are your plans if he needs to go to a nursing home? These are things to discuss with the attorney.

Keep copious notes on EVERYTHING you do. I got a big spiral-bound school notebook and wrote down everything that went on every day with my dad when he got sick. I wrote down phone numbers, names, appointments, what the doctors said, documented trips to the bank, how much I spent at the grocery store -- everything. Make that your evening ritual -- write it ALL down. Trust me, it'll save your sanity to be able to off-load all that stuff every night, and once you've written it down, you know you can go back and refer to it again. I carried that notebook with me everywhere for months, and it became the book for Mom's care, too.
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graygrammie Oct 2021
About #5 -- If I am put on my dad's accounts as joint owner, then am I to consider that part of MY assets? And what do then I have to report at tax time? Right now we are in a very low tax bracket. However, if I have to include dad's accounts, that will change, which would actually be a hardship since I wouldn't actually access that money until his passing.

The notebook -- What a great idea. Thanks for explaining that.
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His assets are for his care, not for inheritances.
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Jcrane, welcome!

Have you gotten Power of attorney for financial and medical matters?
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I had to learn how to do this for my elderly aunt (she asked me to be her POA and wanted to stay in her apartment with home care, she is now deceased) and now for my elderly mother who is still alive and wanted to move to a senior/assisted living facility. You don't say whether you live near him and whether he is still capable of handling his own affairs. All of the things you need to do are easier if you are nearby. If not, you may have to take time off to get them done. While he is still able to sign legal papers, make sure that he sets up Powers of Attorney (POA) for both financial and medical matters. This means that you can take over for him if he becomes incapacitated. He needs a "living will", which has his medical directives, such as "do not resucitate, no feeding tubes or heroic measures" (if he wants that), etc. You'll have to discuss this with him. It sounds like his main asset may be the house. He should also have a will (it sounds like he does - you can ask the attorney for a copy of it). Hopefully he'll make you POA and beneficiary/executor of the will. You may need an attorney for these legal papers. You can ask your father's attorney for advice (there will be a charge for it). Get connected with a local social worker and senior groups who can advise on how to get these things done at lower cost, including a pro bono attorney, if needed. Banks and financial institutions (credit card companies, brokerage firms etc.) often have their own POA forms, which he'll have to sign. It's best if you are there with him. My mother made me joint owner of her bank accounts. This makes things much easier. Ask your father's credit card company to issue you a card on his account with your name on it so that you can make purchases for him. This can be done with a phone call, he needs to be sitting with you to agree to this. You need to be on file with Medicare and Social Security to be able to speak on his behalf. This can be done with a phone call with him sitting there with you to agree to it. You'll need a list of all of his assets and companies that are billing him, with contact information (name, address, account number, telephone number, email, website (passwords), etc.) and also for his attorney, etc. I did this on a spreadsheet for my aunt and mother, taking information from their financial statements and bills. I also had a list of people who took care of my parents' house (handyman, person who shovels snow, etc.) If you and he are up to it, you may want to make his funeral arrangements while he is alive: purchase a plot, get a funeral home, discuss with him how he wants it to be. My aunt had everything set up ahead of time, and it made arrangements much easier. When I had POA, I set up as much as I could with online accounts so that I could manage things from my home. My aunt and mother let me take over their financial affairs. I had to do "unclaimed property" searches to reclaim a lot of money that my aunt had let lapse. I consolidated their accounts to make things easier to manage. After he passes, the funeral home will notify social security and will issue you his death certificates. Depending on the amount of the assets, the estate may have to go into probate. Your father's attorney can advise you if this happens. I had to ask for a lot of death certificates for my aunt as she had many small accounts. Each account (including accounts for utility bills, property tax payments, etc.) have to be notified of the death and who the new owner is. If your father has a safe deposit box, make sure you know where the key is and how to get into it. Safe deposit boxes get restricted when someone dies until the new legal owner is legally determined. Try to get joint ownership of the safe deposit box, if that's possible. Regarding repairs to the house, you may want to get quotes, so that you understand the costs involved.
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And get with an elder care lawyer if you think Medicaid will have to help pay for health care (especially nursing home care) at some point. Medicaid has a 5-year look back provision, meaning even if assets are gifted, transferred, put in certain types of trusts (all possible asset protection-type activities) your state may nevertheless go after it. Medicaid requires funds be spent down to a total asset profile (that is the value of everything) of maybe $2K (each state is different) before it kicks in. Your dad's Wills, Trust and Estate attorney may work with or recommend an elder care attorney to help handle any Medicaid-related planning steps. Your area agency on aging may also be of help.
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Go and see the lawyer who did your father's will. Since you're his caregiver you may have a right to be paid out of your father's money. The lawyer will show you how his estate is set up. If you are on the deed to his property then you will be allowed to keep half it's value if he goes on Medicaid.
If your father hasn't already made you his POA for his financial and healthcare decisions get that done with the lawyer and your father. It's better to have this done then to be appointed conservator/guardian by the court. There's no wiggle room when the court appoints because a person has to answer to them for every little thing. If you've got a POA done in advance, you can move money around and withdraw money for things like home repair without having to answer to the probate court for every little thing.
The lawyer who did his will can best advise you. Go and see him with your father.
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I don't understand why the State would step in. Are you thinking Medicaid? If you think they will be needed to pay for his care that 35k could be used on repairs on the house to spend it down. Otherwise that 35k would need to be used for his care before Medicaid will pay.

Why would the city make him move out if he own the house? Is he not paying taxes?
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Number one ! HIRE A LAWYER..... Even though it will be too late to save all of his assets from Medicare taking them from him to pay for his nursing home payments , the lawyer can save a small percent for his children . Like me, he should of at least put his home and any other valuable into an IRREVOCABLE TRUST. IT MUST BE IN THERE FOR AT LEAST FIVE YEARS OTHERWISE THE GOVERNMENT CAN TAKE IT.
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rovana Nov 2021
Medicare does not take anybody's assets - Medicaid will try to recoup care costs by putting lien on house. Very fair really.
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There is a difference between Medicare and Medicaid and it's Medicaid that can take your Dad's assets - but only under certain circumstances. Ask around and find a well regarded ELDER LAW attorney (should specialize in Elder Law). Many lawyers give free consultations. It sounds intimidating but a good lawyer will break it all down for you, guide you, and do most of the work. Since your Dad already has a will, he may also have a Health Care Proxy and durable POA naming you - but you need to find out. So that's your starting point. After that, if you have POA and control of finances you can make any necessary repairs to the house. You may want to retain most of his assets to help pay for an in-home aide for your Dad if and when it all becomes too much for you alone. If he isn't on Medicaid, private care can easily deplete finances.
Hope this helps.
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gladimhere Oct 2021
Medicaid will not "take" the assets. Let's remember his assets are for his care and only become inheritance after he passes.

Medicaid will place liens on the house to recover as much of the cost of care as possible.
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MJ1929 is absolutely correct. Don’t hesitate to add your name to your fathers bank accounts. When your father passes, you may have many outstanding bills to pay and will be able to write checks from a joint account. Power of Attorney is very important but keep in mind, that many places don’t always honor it. Not sure why, but I did have that happen that happen.
Good luck.
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gladimhere Oct 2021
Power of Attorney ends at death.
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