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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
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For example, she claims we would go away as a family every weekend. I told her we went 3 to 4 times a year, and she became insistent and rude that she was right.
Yes and my FIL got caught. He said he was in a mental institution during the end of WW2 and we found documentation that part was correct. However, he went into detail that while he was there he had a special procedure done to him. By the time he was finished he had decribed a frontal lobotomy. He has told this story over and over for decades. However upon a recent MRI, there is NO evidence of a lobotomy or any other procedures done to his brain. He also boasts tons of sexual conquests (claims over 300 plus women). I told my husband once that his dad never had that much money. We seriously doubt his stories claiming conquests with all these women. We have found discovered a lot of things that don't add up and thinks he takes stories that happened to other people and adapts them into his life. He hits about 16 out of 19 signs of a sociopath. You'll never get anyone though to test him at his age. It's just easier to rubber stamp him with dementia and try to convience the family that it is all just old age. My husband and I know the difference though. If you talk to some of these seniors kids, some can tell you their parents were "not right" for decades.
Oh yes of course they do, their minds play games on them and they get facts mixed up. From experience it is best not to argue the issue but shrug it off and go on. It is a sign they are generally getting worse where memory is concerned. I was talking about my father and my mother rolled my father her husband into HER FATHER, saying he worked on the Southern Pacific Railroad and where they had lived. It was true but she was referring to her father not her husband. Sometimes Mom thinks I am her sister and will ask if I remember something we did a very long time ago. If I try to explain she becomes angry so it is better to just go along with the story.
I often wonder as the child we remember the bad things are parents did to us more and as the parent they remember the good things they did for us. My Mom seems to think she was a happy stay at home Mom throughout my childhood but I remember her going back into the work force when I was 9 and coming home to an empty house. She is remembering the times before that when she DID stay at home and I am rememberiing the times I was scared to come home to an empty house ( I was an anxious child) But as for our right lies, so far my parents haven't gotten there just a little different perception of reality. I guess we are both right , though. I do remember when I was sick and she brought in a bucket of the first big snow fall for me to play with inside. I could not go outside. It was so cool playing with snow at the kitchen table. My Barbies loved it! So I do remember some good things! :0) But she also made me drink my brother's grape juice that I threw a green bean in during dinner. Meanie. ;0). (I digress, sorry)
When I saw the topic I thought to myself "Do fish like water?" Lol!
I really like joycews answer here because it touches on something we don't consider all the time... and we should, I think... and that is that some individuals, old or not, tend to be quite imaginative or boastful. In my personal experience with my father, how he THINKS translates into him saying weird stuff to me and I just think he's gone bonkers... but then I put it in perspective and realize that he's BEEN like that (...a weirdo...) for as long as I've known him, so its not just his dementia or forgetfulness at play here.
Ronald Reagan did that once before we knew he had ALZ. He talked about his experiences in WWII as a soldier, but he wasn't in the military. He was thinking of a film he was in!
The technical term for this is "confabulation". Made up senarios the person believes 2 b true -- AND you will NEVER convince the person s/he is mistaken, so DON'T EVEN TRY ! ! Persons (not just seniors) with dementia, in some cases generalized memory loss MAY tend to confabulate in and around their memory gaps. But this is where dementia has so many variants. Underneath it, the person is still who they were, only different. Best example so you know what l mean: l've known people who were gruff and offputting who are mean & nasty in their dementia; yet others who were gruff & offputting in their competentcy were pleasant even sweet in their dementia. In the 1st case, he just was who he was but un the 2nd case, he was nice with a protective shell that lifted with the dementia. Not to over simplify, but the same can happen to a nice/nice & mean/nice where the nice shell can lift and reveal mean. These r just examples; there r many more variables. It is to the extent of these variables affecting a particular person with dementia that confabulation, if it exists in a particular case, also varies.
I'm glad someone here touched on sociopathy and not just dementia. I actually encountered a senior who actually was a true sociopath. Greatest stories ever. Played the victim role to the hilt. Finally found out the truth about why the 9 kids (all local) and 25 grand kids never visited or called, nor the neighbors...in fact--nobody. This man was cruel and abusive to everyone his entire life--physically and emotionally. Stalked 3 of his wives (tired to shoot one for leaving him), killed 2 family pets and burned a home down after his wife left him. Reminds me to never judge family members that don't bother. Don't assume it's the kids being lazy. This entire family and local community was traumatized by him. When a neighbor finally called APS to get him help (after he went through 20 agencies that couldn't handle him) he was placed in a psychiatric facility at the age of 79. Hopefully he's getting the help he needs. Many current elders have underlying psych issues that have never been treated due to stigma. Pity.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
He also boasts tons of sexual conquests (claims over 300 plus women). I told my husband once that his dad never had that much money. We seriously doubt his stories claiming conquests with all these women.
We have found discovered a lot of things that don't add up and thinks he takes stories that happened to other people and adapts them into his life. He hits about 16 out of 19 signs of a sociopath. You'll never get anyone though to test him at his age. It's just easier to rubber stamp him with dementia and try to convience the family that it is all just old age. My husband and I know the difference though. If you talk to some of these seniors kids, some can tell you their parents were "not right" for decades.
But as for our right lies, so far my parents haven't gotten there just a little different perception of reality. I guess we are both right , though.
I do remember when I was sick and she brought in a bucket of the first big snow fall for me to play with inside. I could not go outside. It was so cool playing with snow at the kitchen table. My Barbies loved it! So I do remember some good things! :0) But she also made me drink my brother's grape juice that I threw a green bean in during dinner. Meanie. ;0). (I digress, sorry)
I really like joycews answer here because it touches on something we don't consider all the time... and we should, I think... and that is that some individuals, old or not, tend to be quite imaginative or boastful. In my personal experience with my father, how he THINKS translates into him saying weird stuff to me and I just think he's gone bonkers... but then I put it in perspective and realize that he's BEEN like that (...a weirdo...) for as long as I've known him, so its not just his dementia or forgetfulness at play here.