My mother‘s stepson forced her husband, who also has Alzheimer’s, to sign a POA against his will. This was her husband’s biological son. Her husband came home crying after it was done because he was scared. Soon after he had a mini stroke, and the stepson wiped out all of their joint accounts, changed beneficiaries to himself, and put her husband in a nursing home. He would not let my mom see him or talk to him. This put my mom off the deep end and she is not even the same person now. Not only did the stepson take her husband away, but all the money that she had saved for them by taking care of her husband with Alzheimer’s all by herself for 13 years, the stepson took it all. I recently just found out that her stepson somehow had my mom sign away all her dower rights on her husband’s property. I don’t know how he legitimately did that when my mom has dementia. He must’ve snuck in and did this against my knowledge. My mom was in an assisted living and I wasn’t there. He did this and took his dad‘s house and put it in his own name.
I have tried to find a lawyer to help me, but no one wants to get involved. I’m running out of money to take care of my mother. There is no reason why they should not been allowed to stay together. That way they could afford it and still be together, but the stepson will not allow it. How can he have that kind of power? I have been through hell since this all happened and my mother is a shell of herself. I have wrote letters to everyone and made calls to all the places that are supposed to help the elderly, but I cannot find one person willing to help me.
This isn’t a civil matter. It’s a criminal matter.
Now more than ever I wish I had been a lawyer because not one good one can be found. At least I cannot find one. Been trying for a long time.
OP, you risk however that the news will also not touch this case. A lot of people just don’t care and don’t want to get involved.
Keep also trying to find a lawyer who will help you.
From your description OP, it seems your parents weren’t officially diagnosed with Alz/dementia. It seems like it’s a diagnosis you gave.
If there really had been a diagnosis by a doctor, the step-son clearly violated the law by getting a signature for POA from
a person with dementia. Since no lawyer wants to take the case, I believe it’s - you - saying they have dementia: but that’s only your opinion. Then it’s very difficult to prove the signature was forced. Your father then willingly signed. He didn’t have a gun to his head. Proving undue influence is very hard.
I hope someone can help you.
you = OP
your mother = M
your mother's husband = H
step-son = S
nursing home = NH
Some simple things to start with:
1. It seems H is in an NH. This means he's not in memory care. Or do you mean he's in memory care (for people with dementia)? If he's been diagnosed with dementia, you won't be able to get POA over him. It's too late. Then you can only try to get guardianship ----- but it's extremely expensive if you try; so I don't think you can afford to. In a guardianship case, you can argue in court that you (rather than S) are a better guardian for H. The court will ask H his opinion too: "H, who do you want as your guardian, OP or S?"
If however, H hasn't been diagnosed with dementia, he's completely free to decide for himself who he wants as visitors. Then he's mentally competent. He's even free to leave the NH. Then he's not a prisoner. He can't be kept there against his will.
It seems from the answers you're giving people on the forum that you don't know if H has been diagnosed with dementia or not.
2. You believe H was forced by S to sign POA. Is it possible he wasn't forced? He willingly signed and was mentally competent when he signed? IMPORTANT: If H is still mentally competent, he can revoke the POA whenever he wants. He can make a new POA. Someone needs to inform H he can revoke S.
3. Regarding possible theft, etc. You should report it to the police. Even if the police don't help you, it'll be on record that you tried. In the end, only a lawyer can help you OP.
Like I said, I already went to the police and filed a report. The report is 70 pages long. It is documented, so it is already been reported.
I know this is why the stepson has gotten away with all this stuff for so long because most people cannot afford to pay thousands and thousands of dollars to get help. The stepson can’t afford it because he uses other peoples money that he has stolen. As usual the crooks always win.
I am pretty sure that my mom‘s husband would probably sign anything that anybody put in front of him to be honest. When I talked to an attorney to have the POA changed the attorney told me that my mom‘s husband was probably the kind of person that would sign anything so he could change it every week. I think I am fighting a losing battle when it comes to my mom’s husband because he will not stand up for himself. The only way to do that is to have someone talk to her husband when there was nobody else around and that has been impossible as well.
Alzheimer’s and dementia is one of the worst diseases in the world as far as I’m concerned and I have seen a lot of people pass away. It is an evil cruel disease.
The POA has no rights to do what he did. And because ALZ is involved, Moms husband was not capable to sign a contract. I would start with APS and then a lawyer.
I called APS, police, and so many attorneys. No one is interested and no one cares. Said it was too complex. They said I could apply for guardianship of mom’s husband, but I know that would be a waste of time and money because the court would not give me guardianship over his dad and over a biological son. The son is also a compulsive liar and has lots of money to get these kind of lawyers. Not sure how he got the POA forms signed. The ones form he had his dad sign was during the lockdown so I have no idea how he got an the Atty in there.
You're in a very unfortunate situation with no one willing to help you.
The only type of person who can help you is a lawyer.
POA/etc., these are legal documents. Only a lawyer can try to help you to challenge the step-son's POA document. But you said no lawyer wants to get involved. I wonder if that's because they know you don't have much money to pay them? Or do they believe you have no case?
It's terrible you're in this situation. When our loved ones get elderly, that's exactly when one sees greed, etc., the true nature of various family members. This happens to so many families everywhere.
I know I need a lawyer, but that’s the problem. I can’t find one. I have spent hours and hours making phone calls and writing letters with no help and even no replies. The police told me that it was hard to convict because the stepson had POA and that’s what the law goes by. He told me that what the stepson did was very bad and very unethical, but was not illegal so I would have a hard time.
Our legal and justice system seems to only work for the crooks. You noticed that? Our government proves that.
It would help if you could go above the heads of the policemen you have talked to – to the State politician in charge of police, or the local ombudsman (where your ‘case’ would be about being turned down by the police because it’s ‘too hard’ - which is a genuine 'ombudsman' issue). It's possible that the Ombudsman you fell out with has left.
If possible, turn it into a Federal case. Go to the top, not the lower level people, because it IS too hard for the people on the desk.
If you don’t get anywhere, it is very very hard, but don’t let it consume and ruin your life. You only have one.
Seems you have tried just about every other avenue. Social media could be what leads you to a solution.