My mom gets up just about every hour at night to go to the bathroom. What can I do to get her to sleep through the night?

A possible help might be to hydrate her a large amount during the day time but give her less fluids before going to bed.

She needs to be evaluated by a physician. Do you know WHY she has the urge to urinate every one or two hours? Does she do this during the day, also? A simple bladder scan prior to and following urination will tell if she has urinary retention with overflow or not. Or perhaps she has a urinary tract infection or irritation. She is 94. This is exhausting for both of you.

We are human. I hate getting impatient with my husband but when I'm lying in bed and wake up hearing him pee in my bathtub yet one more time, or the smell wakes me up and I know I have to get up in the middle of the night to change him, change the sheets, clean the carpet, etc, etc, etc. what did help was finding a nursing home that provided respite care. I placed him for 5 days, got the best rest of my life, and now he's home and I'm refreshed and much more patient. I keep the bedroom door locked so he can't wander far and I'm right there if he needs anything.

Many elderly people develop "nocturia" which is the urge to urinate multiple types a night. Not unusual. I work a lot with Parkinsons folks and it is common with about 60% of them. However they have horrible problems with getting in/out of bed so the frequency makes their problems even worse. Often the spouse is falling apart because they are helping their partner 5-10 times a night. Everyone needs periods of uninterrupted quality sleep to stay healthy.

I have been thru the same situation and my mom did not want to "go" in her "pull ups"... After much sleep loss, I was becoming a zombie and ready to fall over... The best solution I believe... get a friend or neighbor (trusted caregiver) who can sleep some during the day to come and quietly be there (reading with flashlight or knitting?) to help her get up during the night... Even if it is just 5-7 hours at night... it will give you some much needed peaceful sleep and restore your energy and patience for the rest of the day. Even if you (or combined family) can only afford a few nights a week... I got Mom comfortable with the lady we found to come and visit during the day (a few times)so she would feel comfortable with her and allow her to help during the night. There are many good caring, honest people who might do this. Churches often have trusted members wanting to help and make a little money. I always checked multiple references if I did not really know them well. The help was such a blessing to me.
Buni

My DH started needing my help to relieve himself (holding him and the urinal) and I realized he had been getting up to void hourly. The reason I hadn't been aware is that after being sent home to die from the hospital, he just wasn't able to get out of bed but could manage quite well on the couch.

Anyway, after "the weekend from h*ll," I took him to the doctor to ask about a catheter. Instead, he was put on Flomax to allow him to empty his bladder and thus be able to sleep longer.

I know there is a medication for women as I see the commercials all the time on TV. You need to be present at the doctor's so you can ask the right questions. And, if a catheter is the answer, at least you will both start getting a good night's sleep.

We've been able to put the catheter on the 'back burner' for the time being, but we both know it is in my DH's future as he is 95. As long as I can keep him out of a hospital bed and he is able to get up to void, we will put off the catheter.

Regardless, this is a matter you need to take up with your Mother's Physician. Even Depends isn't the answer as they will just need changing that much more often. I don't even want to think about the problems that would arise from not changing them when needed.

It may be time to have her checked for OAB, over active bladder. The last thing you would want is to sedate her only to cause more problems later because her body held it all night when she may have actually had to go that many times in the night. It sounds like there's probably an underlying problem with an over active bladder if she really is going that many times. If she's really doing something in the toilet when she gets up, then definitely have her checked out by a doctor who specializes in this area. For all you know, it may turn out to be something as simple as her drinking fluids too close to bedtime and maybe even in the bedroom, I don't know. You may want to install a nanny cam to see what she's doing in her room and if she has fluids in her room that she may be drinking at night that you may not know about. If she sleeps out in the living room, you can install a nanny cam there as well as anywhere you would keep drinks. I would first use the nanny cam and see if she may be drinking stuff to close to bed especially throughout the night. If so, there's your answer right there. Even I know enough to not really drink anything too close to bedtime because I know i'll be up and down frequently throughout the night. If I'm going to drink too close to bedtime, I'll just go to bed later when my body is ready and I'm done going. This may actually be the answer to the problem if she doesn't have overactive bladder but something is definitely going on. No one gets up that much through the night without an obvious cause, and it's up to you now or someone to find out what that cause is well in advance. If this is something that's easily correctable, then this can be tackled at home if it's something as simple as cutting off the liquids about 2 to 3 hours before bed at very least. This will give the body a chance to process all excrements before bed. What appears to be over active bladder may not necessarily be a medical condition if the person is just drinking a lot of fluids because the bladder is constantly collecting urine. If she really has to go in the night, you definitely don't want to give her a sleeping pill unless you want bigger problems later. It's just not worth it, also see if she may be tanking down liquids close to bedtime. A friend of mine had a dog that did just that and we had to end up pulling up the water so long before bedtime. The problem seemed to stop until the dog started holding some of his urine in for later when he would sneak into the living room in the middle of the night and pee right in the middle of the floor. I found out when it was going on because I caught him red-handed one night and woke my friend who quickly got up and I addressed the problem. Of course we had to become an outdoor dog because he could not be inside with this type of behavior problem and he happened to be a Dalmatian. We just didn't know what to do with him and fortunately there was someone able to take him but unfortunately he ended up dying a short time later that summer. We're not sure why he died but he was still pretty young but we just couldn't figure out why he was behaving like he was, this confused us all. I don't know that maybe this elder may also be struggling with an incontinence problem and the reason why she must get up so often is because maybe there are no adult diapers available to help alleviate the problem. Any self-conscious person with an incontinence problem will take steps toward trying to control it the best they can if they don't have what they need to help alleviate the problem. I would definitely look into what's causing the problem because there could be anything causing it

Have you tried a motion monitor? That works really good and when my monitor goes off after 2 beeps I know she's trying to get up. So that's my alert to check in on her.

Many elderly people have "nocturia"- the urge to urinate many times a night. We work with many Parkinsons folks and records show that 60% have this (a brain malfunction). When this happens we suggest people put a commode next to a Superpole (or balance pole of a Friendly Bed). Grab the pole to stand and pivot onto the commode and back into bed. Eliminates the risky walks to the bathroom (and crashes) when sleepy, weak, heavily medicated, and in the dark.

I have MS & Lupus and have UTI often, I also would get up so so often at night that I kept my husband from sleeping until my doctor suggested that I may not be emptying all the way which was also a cause of more UTI. I learned that I may take 10 mins to empty and have to lean from one hip to the other or use my little potty stool to raise my feet or maybe one foot at a time but once I feel like I am empty I go back to bed and I'm good for several hours. May be difficult to explain to mom and may have to invest into a potty stool, it's also great for bowel movements (I just bought one of thos little step and I use my hands to lift my legs up on it, it's about 6" high but lower would be better and they do sell them specially for that I thinkmaybe at Walmart). I hope it helps you, goood luck and don't forget to take care of yourself because you can't take care of mom or anyone else if you're not well.

Please.
Put on your own oxygen mask first.
It is time to enlist help. You cannot be effective 24/7/365.
Either in-home help or place her in a nursing home near you where you can supervise her care as often as you wish.
It
is
time.

With my husband, it was anxiety. Anti depressants and anti anxiety meds have helped.

For the urine incontinence', Try this action to get the bladder fully empty. Void until you feel empty. Then stand up for a minute or so and again try to void. You may find that this you can that several tablespoons more can come out. Then after voiding you may feel complete bladder emptying.

Many elderly people develop "nocturia"- the urge to urinate many times a night. Walking to the bathroom when lightheaded, sleepy, heavily medicated, and in the dark is a recipe for disaster. In those cases we advise a bedside commode near to a SuperPole (or Friendly Bed balance pole)- a simple grab of the pole to stand and pivot onto the commode (and back onto the mattress) means no risky walking. Doesn't reduce the urge but almost eliminates the risk of a night time fall. Many people are one crash away from leaving their home forever so the right assistive products can be critical. Good luck.

Hi, have you raised the possibility with her physician to have a urinary bag? It has to be changed once a day only, empty it couple of times during the day. It greatly improves quality of life as she would be able to sleep though the night and not being tired next day. Also, don't have to worry about toilets on outings. It can be nicely tucked away under clothing. You wouldn't believe how many people wear it!

What Bout some prescription med for sleep? Also the bedside commode is good idea anyway with her age,etc

An update to my last response. I have now taken my husband totally off of meds (with doctor's direction) and replaced them with banana tea and 5 HTP. Banana tea: clean and cut ends off unpeeled banana. Cut in two and boil 3-5 minutes. Strain into cup. May add sweetener.

It's the magnesium that does it. 3 x the magnesium in the peel as in the banana.

First, thank God she is not incontinent. Now, she should have a portable commode next to her bed so she can pivot and use it. The less walking in the night the safer for her. It's obvious she is a fall risk. Keep her up more through the day as she may have them mixed up. Best of Luck to you.

As a long time night nurse(RN) I know the importance of unbroken sleep and how to promote it. Always always get a bedside commode at least for nights. If you can afford the extra there are BSC's which look like attractive cushion chairs. At night, you can remove the seat so she just has to get out of bed directly onto the commode. There are plastic bags to go in the commode so you don't have to scrub every day. Also keep on hand paper blue pads to cover the to seat of the BDC. If incontinence is in bed it is useful to buy large washable bed pads especially for nights on the bed. Another factor is that protein promotes wakefulness and carbohydrates promotes relaxation and sleeping. So save the protein for lunch or afternoon snack. Myself, if I am just lying in bed too awake I get a small glass of milk and 5 gingersnaps and always go to sleep after that. Heating the milk makes a chemical that promotes sleep.Peace of the lord who will provide.

I am elderly and get up 4 to 5 times a night. If I lived with one of my children they would go crazy with my getting up and wandering around the house. I was able to cut down on bathroom trips by no liquids after 6pm. In case of accident I wear depends. The commode by the bed would help me but not ready yet. It is dangerous getting up at night and try hurrying to the bathroom. The depends gave me a much more secure feeling. It is weird at first thinking I was wearing a diaper. I have pull ups. Give her the OK to go with the depends. Hope you find a solution. Wonderful caretaker you are.
It's a progressive situation. Get your rest. Present this solution to her in as a dignified manner as possible. Bless you

Find the patience. You do have it good. Your mother is 94 and is trying her best not to be incontinent which is your blessing. Get a bedside commode next to her bed this will limit her in her room and less walking around at night. I dropped the arm next to Mom's bed who doesn't walk at all. She can stand and pivot onto the commode. Good luck.

Just an observation from my own personal experience—when I eat a lot of salt, sometimes not even realizing it, I often go to the bathroom almost every hour through the night. I don’t know why, but it seems to happen more in the summer than the winter. There is a lot of salt canned food, if your mom eats that.

I would be so lucky if my husband goes to the bathroom every hour!

The Dr. can prescribe OXIBUTIN for incontenence. stopped my mom from getting up at night.inconvenience.

I am right there with you I have the same issue with my mom sometimes it’s every 30 minutes and I just want to cry because I am so worn out and hardly get any sleep at night. My mom will be 93 this April her doctor ruled out a UTI last week which was my first thought as she has had several of these in the past. I have made appointment with the urologist that he recommended but that is not until the end of the month. I have tried Kirkland Costco brand sleep aids which worked several months ago but now seem to do the opposite she stays awake after taking them. I have also tried Azo pumpkin seed extract which worked OK for a while but now seems to do nothing. I am at my wits end. Her doctor seems to think she may have overactive bladder and says there was a prescription for that so that is our next option.

Check with her doctor but Tylenol PM became my best friend. It helps Mom sleep all night and she really feels refreshed in the morning. May consider having her sleep in a pull up as well as a portable commode next to her bed. I rearranged my mom's room so I could hang a shoe rack behind her door which stores all her needs. Then the commode is next to the bed so all mom has to do is stand and pivot and sit. A hospital bed is a great thing to have to. Dr. should approve and insurance will provide if you have.

See a Urologist.. my Mom had constant urges.. we tried pills with not much success. Finally, the Urologist suggested Botox shot in bladder.. takes a few weeks to work but the difference is amazing.

Melatonin - are you giving her liquid or pills? My father swears the liquid works MUCH, MUCH better than the pills. Bedside commode is another good thing. But if you can get her to stay asleep, Depends are great. How late is she drinking liquids before bedtime? Is she on dieuretics? If so, can you change the time of day those are given? How frequently does she go to the toilet during the day? I think the key is to get something in her nightly that will help her STAY asleep and using Depends.

My mom is 93 and she was like this too. It always turns out to be a UTI And when she has won the frequency is always more at night