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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Can I suggest you don't have him move in? Unless you are a registered nurse, you are likely going to be overwhelmed fast, and lose your own sense of your own life very quickly. Extended care or assisted living is better for both your family and him.
Insurance tends to not see family "caregivers" as worthy of being paid. So, this likely will be out of his pocket.
As Power of Attorney, you can be paid, but "reasonable". I'm paid about $600-800 for full time work. My father's needs have been extensive. If that sounds like a lot, consider if i were working doing what I usually "do", my bill rate is $150 / hour. Most month's I'm not making $2/ hour.
This started out being a one-week "need", then it kept expanding. My father wasn't living with me. This was long distance support. A normal day (?) 4:30am PST to 3:30pm PST, sleep a couple hours. Get up and try to focus on something for me - even if it were just to get a shower, watch News, eat something, and then start in my computer work at about 8:30pm PST - sometimes 2am. Then sleep and get up and do it all over again - 6-7 days a week. I've learned a lot but this level of stress and no sleep has taken a toll on my health. It's also drained my savings.
My father is 93. Almost four years later, my vote is if your father has insurance, or if not can qualify for Medicaid, let him to go Assisted Living and you can visit as often as you like -- but you keep BOUNDARIES so you don' t lose your sense of self. I don't know your situation. What if your father lived to be 100, or older? How long are you willing to give up your life, your family needs, or whatever other needs you may have to be responsible for ....
Love yourself AND your father -in-law. Get him the best care possible - - and likely this may not be with you.
You mentioned his being overweight. My father weighs about 160 pounds at 5'8". It took TWO NEIGHBORS (one a nurse) to get him up off the floor last Friday when he fell after being sent home from the hospital too early.
Don't assume you can lift your FIL if he falls. And if you can - at what cost to your back?
waystation49 .. I'm not sure what country you live in but I'm from Canada and up here "Assisted Living" does not provide any care unless you pay extra on a separate contract. Assisted Living is when an elderly person moves in to a small suite in a communal living facility and they go down to a dining room for meals etc. They have their laundry taken care of and their suite cleaned. They do not have any personal care, no meds given and if they fell in their suite nobody would no. A Long Term Care facility provides all of the above mentioned and unless there is government subsidy involved they are approx. $5,000 a month. I'm not sure how it works south of the border but I do know that the words "Assisted Living" are very misleading up here.
Same in the USA ... Assisted Living is not 24 hr care... He sounds like he needs a Nursing Home... But if you choose to care for him at home you should have him pay house hold utilities ... Don't have him write a check in your name, you would have to claim it on your taxes and if he needs to apply for medicaid it would be questionable on the 5 yr look back...
I also would suggest NH care if possible. My FIL moved in with us 3 years ago pays $300 per month which does not even cover the cost of his food anymore. He does not see that the cost of groceries has almost doubled in that time and he eats like a horse. He has required more and more care and it falls on me and now is refusing to wear depends so there is constant problems with that. His TV runs 16 hours a day and we can go nowhere. You can't even put a price on this stuff. The actual dollars and cents cost of keeping him here if you don't consider "rent" for the space is probably about $500. If you must do it guesstimate a bit more than you think it will be because getting a rent increase will probably be killer in a year or two.
Your question tells me you have not done any research into the pro's and con's of accepting money in caring for a relative. There is definately more con's and ramifications in considering this situation. Tax issues and medicaid qualifications is only the start. I would recommend you consult with an eldercare attorney or an eldercare case manager before you accept payment for those services.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Insurance tends to not see family "caregivers" as worthy of being paid. So, this likely will be out of his pocket.
As Power of Attorney, you can be paid, but "reasonable". I'm paid about $600-800 for full time work. My father's needs have been extensive. If that sounds like a lot, consider if i were working doing what I usually "do", my bill rate is $150 / hour. Most month's I'm not making $2/ hour.
This started out being a one-week "need", then it kept expanding. My father wasn't living with me. This was long distance support. A normal day (?) 4:30am PST to 3:30pm PST, sleep a couple hours. Get up and try to focus on something for me - even if it were just to get a shower, watch News, eat something, and then start in my computer work at about 8:30pm PST - sometimes 2am. Then sleep and get up and do it all over again - 6-7 days a week. I've learned a lot but this level of stress and no sleep has taken a toll on my health. It's also drained my savings.
My father is 93. Almost four years later, my vote is if your father has insurance, or if not can qualify for Medicaid, let him to go Assisted Living and you can visit as often as you like -- but you keep BOUNDARIES so you don' t lose your sense of self. I don't know your situation. What if your father lived to be 100, or older? How long are you willing to give up your life, your family needs, or whatever other needs you may have to be responsible for ....
Love yourself AND your father -in-law. Get him the best care possible - - and likely this may not be with you.
You mentioned his being overweight. My father weighs about 160 pounds at 5'8". It took TWO NEIGHBORS (one a nurse) to get him up off the floor last Friday when he fell after being sent home from the hospital too early.
Don't assume you can lift your FIL if he falls. And if you can - at what cost to your back?