So Mom’s home aid agency is saying she needs more supervision and care than they can do. It is time (PAST time!!) to find a place for her, period. The manager at the agency (who has been a godsend) recommended a woman who helps find placements for people, and I had a long, detailed conversation with her. Mom will go ballistic and fight it with hysterics and suicide threats (see my recent thread on THAT for background …). Has anyone dealt with these counselor / advice people? I know they are paid by the facilities. I consulted someone like this a while back and it didn’t go well - pushing an unlicensed care home, etc. Any experience or advice would be welcome in making this useful, safe, fair, and reasonable. Thank you!
In terms of your Mom going ballistic, is she on any meds for anxiety right now? Does she have cognitive/memory impairment? You may need to consider a therapeutic fib and get the facility in on it... they will be happy to play along... they've seen it all and want it to go well for her, too.
So, if you use them, realize that you will probably not get an even playing field of options. Eventually, with my own research I have figured out which are the good places and less good... oh well
I have heard from workers at facilities say, “Walk around, if you see employees chatting too long with each other in the hallways find someplace else. Look for a place where it’s obvious that the employees are with the residents.”