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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Lorraine2, I only care for my wife but she had difficulty getting into and out of the vehicle so I built a step to help. It is just a piece of plywood screwed to a couple of 2 x 4's and raises her about two and a quarter inches but that little bit sure has helped both of us. During her rehab the PT and I worked together to teach her how to use it. Although she forgot, it made things easier. It works so well I built two more steps. one for her side of the bed, which is four and a quarter inches high but it gets her farther onto the bed. And we have one to help her transition to and from the garage. All three have have helped tremendously and I haven't had to call the Fire Dept. since she slipped out of the bed and I cannot lift her.She no longer needs the one for the car but I still carry it, just in case. This may not solve all of your problems but it may help some. Best of luck to you.
They need a break from you as well. Depending on their medical conditions and insurance you have a few options. There are services like In Home Support Services were someone comes into the house to help with light housekeeping, personal care and companionship. This is also available through agencies like Visiting Nurses Assoc. at a cost. There are adult day programs that provide a meal and socialization allow you to have some respite. One of the programs that I love is a federally funded program called Senior Companions. There are not that many around because funding for these programs is slim but Senior Companions are seniors 55 and older who have been background checked and are given on-going training. They receive a very small stipend. If you find a program, a Companion is assigned to a client at no cost to them and then they provide up to four hours a week in companionship. They do not do housekeeping or personal care. Clients do not have to income qualify; it is open to everyone. This is one of the programs that has been proposed to be cut. It is a shame because it is a win win program given the number of isolated homebound seniors we have and the number of caregivers needing respite.
Hi Lorraine, You are one heck of a woman! I couldn't do it with just one elderly lady (mom).
I, too, had a terrible time getting my 94 year old mom in and out of the car, into the w/c, onto the toilet, into the doctor's office, etc. I have a bad back and it's an accident waiting to happen. My mom has Alzheimer's too.
If you need to take them both out, could you get someone to go with you? (Paid c/g, friend, neighbor, etc.) Or, have them stay with auntie while you and your mom go out. If it needs to be paid help, mom and aunt should split the bill. You shouldn't pay anything.
God bless you for being there for both of them.
Just a thought, have you made tentative plans for when auntie's Alzheimer's gets worse? I didn't plan ahead and I wish I would have. Mom went downhill fast and I was totally unprepared.
Cdnreader; Thank you for your advice you are right about a social worker ..but so hard to get away unless I have a sitter for the ladies I feel as if this sight helps ,I feel so much better being able to speak out about these problems .And everybody gives very useful advice ,until I can get out more I'll stay with this site Thank all of you.....
It is hard to care for two people with high needs. I know you are doing the best you can. I can see why you wouldn't want to take your aunt out given the challenges you have encountered.
I wonder if its time to talk to a social worker, family therapist and see what other care options are available. It is a lot to for one person to take on. It does sound like your aunt needs more care and supervision given the Alzheimers.
I tried to do it all for my dad after the stroke but I realize now in hindsight that it was a terrible mistake. I got so angry and resentful at the end.
I have 1 more issue ,when I do bring both of my Ladies out its so much work ,not to sound lazy but I'm afraid to leave mom, and can not leave Aunt (alzheimers)they both love to get out but it's soooo hard and I do not want to get irritated ,my aunt will like just all of a sudden stomp her feet down while I'm pushing her wheelchair golly I'm afraid we are BOTH GOING TO FALL OVER, so I can take them both out ,but I do not want to its nerve wracking.1 time I could not get my moms leg back in the car I had to lift it and kinda roll her in whew it's a project .So I try 1 at a time but I find myself still getting worn out expecially with Aunt she just gets so confused like she thought I left her clothes at the church ,at my dads funeral I had to bring her to a funeral that was family and she slept through the whole thing then when it was over started yelling that was the dumbest funeral she ever saw and how could that man call himself a Chaplin, out loud whew I was embaressed then she refused to get into my car she thought it was the wrong vehicle .
When I cared for my dad in my home I gradually stopped going anywhere (errands being the exception). Eventually my friends began inviting my dad along with me to parties or b-b-cues or whatever event was going on which I appreciated. I had to take my dad as I could not tell him I was going out and then not take him. He was so social and needed to be around people. It wasn't easy.
I stumbled across a B&B about 4 hours from home and I would run away on occasion for a short trip as long as I knew my daughter would be in and around home for the time I was gone. My dad didn't exactly need supervision but it wouldn't have been a good idea to leave him totally alone either. I'd come back with my batteries recharged.
Lorraine, by any chance can your Mom and your Aunt [per your profile] chip in to hire a caregiver for half a day, so that you can run errands or do whatever you feel like doing?
I know what you mean about lost of freedom. At times it can feel rewarding helping out, and other times there is resentment for feeling trapped.... [sigh]
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
so I built a step to help. It is just a piece of plywood screwed to a couple of 2 x 4's and raises her about two and a quarter inches but that little bit sure has helped both of us. During her rehab the PT and I worked together to teach her how to use it. Although she forgot, it made things easier.
It works so well I built two more steps. one for her side of the bed, which is four and a quarter inches high but it gets her farther onto the bed. And we have one to help her transition to and from the garage.
All three have have helped tremendously and I haven't had to call the Fire Dept. since she slipped out of the bed and I cannot lift her.She no longer needs the one for the car but I still carry it, just in case.
This may not solve all of your problems but it may help some. Best of luck to you.
You are one heck of a woman! I couldn't do it with just one elderly lady (mom).
I, too, had a terrible time getting my 94 year old mom in and out of the car, into the w/c, onto the toilet, into the doctor's office, etc. I have a bad back and it's an accident waiting to happen. My mom has Alzheimer's too.
If you need to take them both out, could you get someone to go with you? (Paid c/g, friend, neighbor, etc.) Or, have them stay with auntie while you and your mom go out. If it needs to be paid help, mom and aunt should split the bill. You shouldn't pay anything.
God bless you for being there for both of them.
Just a thought, have you made tentative plans for when auntie's Alzheimer's gets worse? I didn't plan ahead and I wish I would have. Mom went downhill fast and I was totally unprepared.
Happy Holidays
It is hard to care for two people with high needs. I know you are doing the best you can. I can see why you wouldn't want to take your aunt out given the challenges you have encountered.
I wonder if its time to talk to a social worker, family therapist and see what other care options are available. It is a lot to for one person to take on. It does sound like your aunt needs more care and supervision given the Alzheimers.
I tried to do it all for my dad after the stroke but I realize now in hindsight that it was a terrible mistake. I got so angry and resentful at the end.
Thinking of you.
I stumbled across a B&B about 4 hours from home and I would run away on occasion for a short trip as long as I knew my daughter would be in and around home for the time I was gone. My dad didn't exactly need supervision but it wouldn't have been a good idea to leave him totally alone either. I'd come back with my batteries recharged.
I know what you mean about lost of freedom. At times it can feel rewarding helping out, and other times there is resentment for feeling trapped.... [sigh]