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I have been looking for someone to spend a couple of hours with my parents, who live with me, once a week, making puzzles, taking walks, etc. I don't actually need the extra help at present, but my mom has dementia and my dad is nearly 90 and frail, so I anticipate needing help in the future. I've identified a great person and after several trial visits, I'd like to start paying her by the hour. I don't know how much to offer her, however. Right now, she's not a caregiver/housekeeper/anything like that but rather is just spending time with them. Looking for suggestions, thank you.

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I’m going to chime in here but be aware that caregiving pay is a sore spot for me.
You say “right now” and that makes me wonder if you’d like to someday start adding on to his/her duties.
Some things to consider… we, as BabyBoomers, are an economic force like nothing that has been seen before. The growth of the caregiving
industry has grown exponentially so there are many shady companies who don’t have your parents best interest in mind. Just keep that in mind.

As for paying some to play games and generally keep your parents occupied, is if that’s light duty for a caregiver is wrong. That is one of the most difficult parts of it and I will assume it’s why you’d like help with it. To start it may only be one or two hours… most agencies have a 4 hour minimum.

if you can find an independent to do this pay him/her at least 30 an hour. Make it worth his/her travel time.

From experience I can tell you that you will ‘go through’ several before you find a good match.
Good luck, love and light
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dawnjohn22 Oct 2022
Thank you so much for pointing out that keeping a Senior occupied with conversation & activities is not an easy task.

I just moved in with a dear friend and I am exhausted after just a couple weeks - he shadows me, constantly repeats himself and talks nonstop. I was fading myself under the pressure. He is a very kind person and of course is in denial of any memory issues etc.,. I am slowly adjusting and utilizing some of the wonderful tips recommended here. Thanks to all of you kind people! Sending Love your way… pass it on!
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My husband has had dementia for seven years. I hire a lady through an agency to come, five days a week, four hours each time. I pay $27 an hour. The caregiver is liscensed, bonded, and insured through the agency. They walk, do puzzles, play games, watch TV together. It gives me a little free time each week.
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I think you have to ask yourself what would it be worth to her to make a commitment to come every week for just a couple of hours. That has to be worth her while. In New Jersey I would offer at least $25.00 per hour and in the first check include payments for the “trial” period.
I
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I pay $25 & $30 /hr for help with my 87 year old mother. It took a few people and differs situations to find the right people that you feel comfortable with but are invaluable! The people that say they’d only pay $15 a hour would you work for that? And what is the quality of care and education or experience ? I needed someone who could be my eyes and ears etc when I am not there . Additionally, you can have this person help if you need to go to assisted living most will also go to the assisted living homes as well and can help with the transition. I
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Weather it’s in home care or a handyman you get what you pay for. Pay min wage you get a min wage person. Ask yourself why they are only making min wage. The more you pay the more skilled and professional they are. $20 plus is a good start.
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If this person is doing no "hands on care" other than spending time with your parents I would think $15.00 to 20.00 per hour would be in line.
If she starts doing more hands on then $20.00 to 25 per hour and as it becomes more involved then about $25.00 to 30 per hour.
Are there Adult Day programs in your area? If so look into that for your parents. Typically a bus/van will pick up participants and a snack or light breakfast, lunch then a snack will be served during the day and activities for both of them.
If mom or dad is a Veteran often the VA has programs that will pay for a Day program and the VA also has programs that will provide a caregiver.
Contact your local Veterans Assistance Commission and they can determine if they qualify for any services.
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Good idea to get them used to another person in the mix. I'm sure you actually DO need the extra help so it will be good for all of you.

I'd offer her $20 and see how it goes. My mom's caregivers get $25/hour and the ones through an agency charges me $30. Maybe start with 3 hours?

I'd think about making a list of things you would like to be done that can include the things you stated (on my list they're called games and exercise) and then add a few other household things like making their beds and doing laundry. If they do it themselves, she can have them help, etc. Making them a meal and cleaning up from it. Things like that.

Good luck.
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$25-30/hour up to a certain level of care if needed. If you really like this person, it is worth being a little generous to keep him or her.
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Minimum $15 an hour. This is very difficult work, and people have no idea until they do it. I hired someone for $17.50 and hour, and am now paying $18.50 an hour.
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My husband is about to go into assisted living. We’ve had two Respite Aides. One was paid for by a grant from the Elizabeth Dole Foundation; I believe she was paid $18/hr. For the past year we’ve had a competent and kind woman who my husband likes and is able to entertain and redirect when necessary. I paid her $20/hr. I’ve used a private duty professional aide for overnight stays and she was $35/hr.

The Dole Foundation has caregiver grants for veterans’ caregivers.
https://www.elizabethdolefoundation.org/hidden-heroes/
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