He is not driving, however, he will walk or will have someone drive him to East Coast Service Station to play the lottery. He is spending money that he does not have. Yesterday, he asked me to stop at the Service Station, because he had to use the bathroom and I did...I did not go in with him. When he finally came out, he told me that he needed $10.00 to pay this lady inside. I asked what happened? He stated that he played the lottery and he did not have enough money for lottery tickets and this nice lady gave him the $10.00 for lottery tickets. I am usually frustrated, but, yesterday, I was calm and I asked why did you do that. He looked at me and say, I don't know, but, he need $10.00. He went back into the store, whereas, the lady came out and told her I was sorry, and I will pay back the $10.00. She stated that she did not give him $10.00, she was offering him $2.00 which he was short of. Soon after, the cashier in the store came out and told me that my husband had left his money and the lottery ticket in the store and she wanted to give his money and lottery ticket back. I told her that my husband has Parkinson disease and dementia and I am sorry. She was sympathetic and stated that she knew about his health issue because she had talked to my step daughter before about how confused he gets when he comes into the store. I don't know, but, is there anyone else out there going through the same problem with their love one? He goes to a Neurologist (moving specialist) and I have discussed this behavior with her before and she prescribed medication to help, but, it appears to be getting worse. My mother has dementia and her doctor prescribed Namenda and she looks like she is doing better with her memory. I ask my husband's Neurologist about Namenda and she stated due to his Parkinson disease, hallucination and sometime aggressive behavior he should not be on Namenda. Is there any advice anyone can provide me on this behavior pattern to help me deal with this situation?
I think I would no longer allow him to go into a public place alone. You may have to be creative in ways to do this, but I would just decide that that is how it has to be. You can no longer rely on his sense of judgment. You or another adult will have to supervise him.
If he loves to play the lottery, then I would set a day and time that you take him to buy them. With dementia patients, so much is lost. I would try to allow him this one thing, if he brings him joy. You say he doesn't have the money for the tickets. Does he get a check each month? Can you set aside a few dollars so he can play it each month? Or just one dollar? Keeping in mind that this is temporary. As dementia progresses, it's likely he will eventually forget about the lottery or stop liking it. I would view it as a temporary thing.
I don't see anything aggressive about the behavior that you have described. Is there more?
One idea is could you go to bingo with him, where you can help him control how much money he uses? Or work out a deal with that store where he's allowed to buy so many tickets and you reimburse them every week? It sounds like they're honest people if they're bringing you his money and the ticket he left.
I would ensure that he does not have access to bank accounts or cash. I would also not allow him to go into stores by himself. It may require a lot of planning to work it out, but I would start now. Impulse control can cause him to do any number of things. I wouldn't take that chance.
Thanks again.
Thanks.