This was a week after telling his doctor he wanted to do whatever was needed to help me. We had already decided to get a reverse mortgage but we have to have a power of attorney to get one. My sons and other family members, as well as his doctor, know this is what he wanted. What do I do? He has good days where he knows what you are asking him and other days, he doesn't. He has not done anything such as handle money matters or healthcare matters for over 4 years. I have been the only person to take care of him and his affairs for these 4+ years.
But all is not lost. If your husband's dementia is worsening you are going to need to obtain guardianship for him at some point in any case, so you might as well start the ball rolling now.
From there, as long as the reverse mortgage can be shown to be in your husband's best interests (and I assume you weren't intending to blow the cash on gin and diamond earrings?), you should still be able to make the arrangements he planned to make. What did he want to release the money for?
I would not give up the hope that your husband can appoint you his POA until you at least consult an elder law attorney. If the attorney does not feel a POA is appropriate at this time, he or she can guide you to the next step.
It is not always necessary to obtain guardianship for someone who has dementia. (I suspect that most cases of dementia do not include a guardian, but I haven't seen statistics.) My husband never needed a guardian. My mother does not have or need a guardian. A friend who is in her late 80s and in NH with dementia does not have a guardian. So .... maybe you will need that eventually, or maybe you won't. Let an attorney advise you on doing it now.
My heart goes out to you in this frustrating aspect of caring for your loved one. It is very hard to make decisions and then clearing the red tape when you've made one can be exasperating! Hang in there. I wish you strength.
My mother has no assets to speak of. Nothing much to manage. Several years ago, when she starting getting confused about her bills she put my youngest sister on her checking account. When Mom dies, more than likely Youngest Sis will probably own what is left in the checking account. None of us cares. What is most likely to happen is that the 7 of us will go out to a fast food lunch on that money and eat a few french fries in Mom's honor. :)
My friend also has very little to manage. One of her three daughters has POA and that has been sufficient to handle what needs to be handled.
Husband/wife situations are probably easier to manage with minimal paperwork than child/parent situations. And small assets are easier to deal with than large estates. Guardianship is definitely necessary sometimes. But it is expensive to obtain and onerous to comply with. I wouldn't take that step unless it was truly necessary.
I'd suggest you post a new question asking for advice on the reverse mortgage. You'll get good advice. Much of that stuff is very suspect, especially for elders.