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Adult day care costs $99/day, with a 2 day/week minimum! My Sweetheart of 54 years has AD. He was diagnosed 9 years ago. I'd like to give him the experience of adult day care, but it is so expensive. I have activities for him to do every day, but I'm wondering if anyone knows what they do at the day care centers that maybe I can add to our home activities. We have coloring, dot-to-dots, stickers, one game on the computer. I'd like to add more but can't think of anything else. I would certainly like to hear what y'all do..... I don't really want to rely on the TV for entertainment.

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Is your husband a Veteran? If so the VA may pay for the Day Care.
You can check with your local Area Agency on Aging and see if he qualifies for any services that may pay for care or a reduced cost day care.
Check with your local Senior Center they may also have programs that would be a good fit for him.
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Hi Helen. For someone diagnosed as long ago as DH was, it seems like YOU are doing a very good job with him.

As long as he’s peaceful and reasonably compliant, his regular routine AND TV sound like a pretty good mix, within the boundaries of what you can do yourself.

Some of the day cares around here invite entertainers, small children, animal visits, interesting things that encourage socialization and attention.

There is a church sponsored group around here. I’m going to find out what they charge so you can make a comparison.
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You are doing a great job at home. And...adult day health programs provide more sources of stimulation, create situations where your DH can interact with the supportive environment around him without your presence, and gives you a block of time that is for YOU. The 2 day/week requirement is because going only 1 day/week ends up feeling like a new experience every time for the participants, which is stressful.
As time goes on, your DH will need more and more assistance, and there will be times when you won't be able to be with him/help him.
Their charge sounds reasonable to me, but that may depend on where you live. Perhaps it is time to do some advanced care planning for DH's future needs, and times when you cannot provide all of his care.
Good luck to both of you.
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Ask about Medicaid. They may pay partial or all of it depending on your income. I placed Mom in one using her money 3x a week. Mon, Wed and Friday. The bathed her for me. Also brought in physical therapy to keep her moving. It is expensive but gave us some freedom fro 8 to 3.
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Many men enjoy sorting nuts and bolts…but really, you got it on the activities.

It’s not just the activities, it’s also the socialization and the fact that you, too, need time away from him for even the absolutely necessary stuff like doctors, banks, the store. There’s a risk in leaving someone for even a minute.

The adult day care sounds like the best solution.
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You might consider easy to play games like dominoes.   I have a tri-omino game which I find relaxing.  It's basically dominoes, but the playing pieces are triangular instead of rectangles.   

My father used to spend a lot of time reading, period magazines such as Reminisce, Country, Farm and Ranch, and the "Extra" versions of the first two.    I've been reading one of the Farm and Ranch magazines and find it very soothing, especially the photos of beautiful open land.   

It's also an interesting insight into farming, getting up well before dawn to feed the animals and do chores, off to work for those who aren't full time farmers or ranchers, then home to work again.  I couldn't maintain that kind of schedule, and I end up feeling lucky that I grew up in suburban areas.

Solitaire with real cards is another potential activity.

The Alz. Assn. used to have a page full of potential activities.   You might check that out; I don't know if it's still available though.
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Contact your agency on aging and inquire about what options they know of. In TN, there is a free adult day care available under the community Medicare label for most seniors that need watching.
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I feel for you, that is so expensive, my husband with PD is in need too of daily routine, activities and socializing away from me.
Fortunately, in Canada, there is many programs for free, even transportation provided. Maybe try to find anything at all, church, community centre?
As they focus in those program on social aspect and socializing, there is also some memory exercise and games.
I bought few books, games for a brain, easy to find on Amazon, there is some courses online for free, could be fun, tried some during lockdown.
We play cards, like canasta, chess, my husband also likes puzzles.
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My mom likes jigsaw puzzles but I don't like keeping track of the pieces. A solution are the Relish brand puzzles. They come in a hinged box: the bottom part is a tray for working the puzzle/containing the pieces. Inside the top part is the picture as a guide. If your LO likes puzzles this is a great self-contained alternative. The bonus is that the pieces stay in the box/tray...you don't have to spread it out on a table.
You can find these on Amazon.
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Could you look into hiring someone to come spend some time with him a few times a week?

A friend's mother has Alzheimer's, and her dad hired some younger women to come do puzzles with her, play Scrabble, and talk about things with her.

My mother's memory care played Hangman with the residents, did trivia time which consisted of the activities coordinator holding up photos of various notable people of Mom's era and reading off some biographical information, and of course, music was everything. Play and sing lots of music your husband would be familiar with.
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Ask if they have "scholarships".
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My Mom's day care did exercises, 2 times a day for about 20-30 minutes, chair exercises, tossing balloons, using a flyswatter to play badminton with balloons, etc. Some participated, some did not. They also did a lot of "trivia" where they had to remember significant events in history. Hangman was popular, as well as matching and math games. They did ring toss and played bowling video game. There were also the art projects and singing. Dancing for those who were able.

Occasionally, people (elderly entertainers) would come in and perform for them.

Around here, adult day care costs vary a lot. After a while, my Mom got bored because it was the "same old games" and the "same old stories"....even though she was diagnosed with MCI.
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HELEN....YOUR BEST BET IS TO JUST GIVE THE DAYCARE A CALL AND ASK
THEM DIRECTLY FOR ADVICE.

THEY'RE THE BEST PEOPLE TO ASK AND I'M SURE THEY WOULD BE WILLING
TO HELP YOU WITH THE ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTION. GOOD LUCK.

ALSO, GIVING YOUR LOCAL SENIOR CENTER (OFFICE FOR THE AGING) IS ANOTHER PLACE WHERE YOU CAN GET YOUR ANSWERS.
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cignal May 2022
fyi when you use all-caps it GIVES THE IMPRESSION YOU ARE SHOUTING!!!
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When I put my husband in adult day care, the director told me about a state funding program for caretakers. It could be used for day care, food, adult diapers and other expenses. This was in New Hampshire and all I had to do was fill out an application. What a blessing! I wished I had known about it sooner.
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Good Morning,

If your loved one is able to get around how about purchasing an UP Walker Lite. They are around $495 or so. You can also buy a less expensive model on Amazon.com This will give your husband some freedom, exercise and if he can go to the supermarket with you. "Some" insurances will cover this.

I agree with you, keep TV to a minimum. There is no need for someone to sit in a recliner in front of CNN all day and think the world is going to the dogs.

Someone else wrote in about the Veteran's Aid & Attendance. I agree it's a lot of paperwork but it may worth it if your husband was a Veteran. You could benefit too, if needed down the road.

I would call back the Adult Day Programs and ask them flat out about grants, etc. Some Churches also have wonderful respite programs. Some facilities are medical models where there is an RN on site as well as p/t, o/t and speech.

Some are on a sliding scale that include transportation. I would contact the Department of Elderly Affairs, a Geriatrician and also your husband's primary care doctor to see--the more heads together on this one, the better. Also what about the AARP website?

My mother's program they are going to make cards for sick children for the local Children's hospital. They paint, cook, garden and soon to be sitting outdoors. The first day Mom was worn so I changed the time and the second time she made some new friends and they are now all going to sit together at lunchtime. Continental breakfast and a hot lunch are provided.

It was so touching my mother told me her new friend hugged her when she was leaving.

My mother's only complaint was that they put 1% milk in the coffee. I told her I can bring you a coffee, she worried that she didn't want her friends to think she was better than them, so today I will go out and buy my mother some "single" half & half creamers to put in her walker pouch when she goes next week. This way here they won't think we're "coffee snobs". I'm trying to make you laugh.

You're right these things are costly and a lot of people that are middle class are out of luck unless they dig in and roll up their sleeves and perhaps make that 10th phone call as was in my case. You're kind of scrambling for the "right" resources for your particular situation.

In life, you find what you're looking for! Amen...

Let's face it, the longer this goes on the more care your loved one will need.
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Worriedspouse May 2022
Or worse Fox News!!
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ADC is much cheaper and more effective than what you can do at home. You can relax while he’s there with other people. Alternative option would be to hire a caregiver which is $30/hr (depending on location). That’s more expensive.
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maybe if you get someone to help out a little go on Care.com and have someone come to the house to give you a break
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Could you create "dance" or exercise sessions? Pick some favorite music to play for 1/2 hour or so and move and/or exercise to the music. Movements can be adapted to do in a chair if he is not very mobile--routines can even be adapted for the bed bound. The music is motivating as well as the movement.
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Puzzles, cards(matching game), tv, is he a veteran?
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My husband attended adult day care for a while. In addition to the things you stated, they had chair exercises, trivia games, ball toss (nerf type ball) and bowling games. They also had a pet therapy dog come in and the seniors would pet him and give him treats (my husband loved that). If practical, is there somewhere you could sit outside with him to get fresh air and sunshine, maybe bird, plane or car watch? Hope this helps.
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Would you be willing to try Visiting Angels??
Here its about 20. or 25. per hour.
It depends where you are.
They are knowledgeable about AD.
Prayers for you and yours
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Getting another AD patient to join you, you could split the cost of a Visiting Angel.

https://www.alz.org/local_resources/find_your_local_chapter
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Each state is different but in NJ Medicaid may pay some of the adult day care costs if your father meets the medical and eligibility requirements. I would call both your local Office on Aging and your state Medicaid officee to investigate further.

Btw.... you seem to be doing a fantastic job of caregiving considering his young age and the length of his dx. Superwoman!!!
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Check with your local Alzheimer’s Association, they may be able to provide Grants or assistance to help with the cost of ADC.

Also provided in the ADC setting is the social interaction with new people. You are keeping him very occupied, but maybe the experience of seeing new faces and the camaraderie of new friends may help. Good luck.
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Ask him to help with daily chores - set the table, wipe off counters and tables, fold linen, vacuum, dust... It won't be perfect but his help will make him feel useful and helpful to you.
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The Adult Day care at the nice place I volunteered at, they had field trips, bowling excursions, shopping, games, future nurses would visit for health assessments, guest speakers, Tea (a big success), trip downtown for Senior day.

Recently, they had a Spring Fling musical, since it was the first time in 2 years due to the Pandemic that they all could meet and be in the same room.
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You can buy big checker games. It’s a square rug-like piece for the floor or a table. The checkers are large and brightly colored. Then he can use whatever rules he wants to make up!

Another idea is to have a race to see who can fold the most wash clothes the fastest (let him win the most). You can buy a dozen wash clothes at Walmart for $5-6.

You can set up empty 2 liter pop bottles and have a bowling game, or find an oldies channel and dance.
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I got the kids Leggo blocks, the ones for little kids. (I think they are called Duplo Blocks) He liked stacking those.
I got a Jenga game he stacked the blocks.
Puzzles, card sorting games. Toy cars.
the problems that I had was that while my Husband was pretty much non verbal he was very oral with things so everything went into his mouth. When he started chewing blocks and cards and puzzle pieces they were removed.
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I just joined "postcrossing.com" where people all over the world connect thru sending postcards to others. It's fun to receive postcards in the mail and u never kno where your next one will come from. Also fun to send them to encourage and send love to others. You might want to check it out. Even if you husband cannot write the cards, you could and share them with him : ) Love to you
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Helen4sure: Not meant to sound childish, but how about folding small cloths?
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Cover999 May 2022
Get boring after a while?
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