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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Is she going every time she has a cup, multiple times a day? If it is just her morning cup of joe then the simple solution is to get her on the toilet after breakfast, or after her afternoon coffee break. And get her into an incontinence pull up.
Switch it out to decaf of the same brand/type behind her back; see if the caffeine is really the culprit. If you're the one who has to deal with the consequences, I would think you have the right to do this. She also may become dehydrated from all the liquid stool; you'd be helping her out.
If your mom’s safety, welfare, and comfort are reliant upon receiving 24/7 care are you able and willing to continue providing it?
If, as her condition progresses, you decide that you and your husband cannot provide her ongoing care, what option(s) will you have?
Many if not most of us who dearly loved our dependent elderly wanted to provide round the clock care instead of residential placement, but found that over time the task becomes more and more overwhelming, then found that they were failing physically and emotionally as fast if not faster than their patient.
Does she prepare her own coffee? Does she buy it? Would she notice if you substitute decaf, or part decaf? The caffeine may or may not cause the laxative effect. Ultimately, what she do if you retells her you can’t get her brand and you have done your best, the serve the decaf as a trial
I used a live-in aide for 7 months before my mother entered a very good residential care center where she lived for 5 1/2 very comfortable, peaceful and happy years. I was appalled that I “failed” her until I realized that her life was much better for her in care as opposed to being with me. Quite a blow to my pride, but TRUE!
Your situation is a tough one. Be sure your choices are fair to you as well as to her. This is one of the situations in life that can’t always be done “right” for everyone involved.
My Mom liked her coffee too but it caused the same thing. So I cut it out. Apple juice too. Sugar free candy will cause the same problem. Now we r in lockdown, its a good time to tell a little white lie. The coffee is gone and I can't get anymore. As Mom progresses, you r going to tell a few white lies.
I was the one doing the toileting and like u washing soiled clothing. Soooo, things went my way.
Yeah well, my mother insists on drinking BOILING hot coffee, which the Memory Care ALF normally refuses to give her, for obvious reasons. She complains chronically to me about the coffee not being BOILING hot, and to them as well, so the other day, a new CNA heated her cup up in the mike, just the way she 'loves it'. Needless to say, she SPILLED the entire cup on her lap in the wheelchair, and burned her legs as a result. Now she's complaining about THAT. You can't always get what you want, isn't that what the Rolling Stones say?
Get rid of the coffee entirely if you feel that it's giving her the runs. If she's still soiling herself after not having coffee, you'll know that wasn't the culprit. Hopefully she's wearing Depends in any event. Nothing gets 'better' with dementia; it only progresses and worsens as time goes on.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If, as her condition progresses, you decide that you and your husband cannot provide her ongoing care, what option(s) will you have?
Many if not most of us who dearly loved our dependent elderly wanted to provide round the clock care instead of residential placement, but found that over time the task becomes more and more overwhelming, then found that they were failing physically and emotionally as fast if not faster than their patient.
Does she prepare her own coffee? Does she buy it? Would she notice if you substitute decaf, or part decaf? The caffeine may or may not cause the laxative effect. Ultimately, what she do if you retells her you can’t get her brand and you have done your best, the serve the decaf as a trial
I used a live-in aide for 7 months before my mother entered a very good residential care center where she lived for 5 1/2 very comfortable, peaceful and happy years. I was appalled that I “failed” her until I realized that her life was much better for her in care as opposed to being with me. Quite a blow to my pride, but TRUE!
Your situation is a tough one. Be sure your choices are fair to you as well as to her. This is one of the situations in life that can’t always be done “right” for everyone involved.
I was the one doing the toileting and like u washing soiled clothing. Soooo, things went my way.
Get rid of the coffee entirely if you feel that it's giving her the runs. If she's still soiling herself after not having coffee, you'll know that wasn't the culprit. Hopefully she's wearing Depends in any event. Nothing gets 'better' with dementia; it only progresses and worsens as time goes on.