Hello everyone and I’m sorry for my English it isn’t my first language. Ok so my grandmother has always been a very difficult person to deal with, her relationship to my mother is horrible and she says she feels “trapped” because of coronavirus (she insists in going out and says we treat her like a prisoner). She cries a lot but if you try to approach her she starts being mean, but then she says no one loves her and then again she says “I hate you all”. I think she might be suffering dementia, what scares me is that sometimes she gets aggressive and erratic. She starts screaming, she “cleans” things to the point of breaking them and once she threw away my dads medicine and he is diabetic. Now I’m getting really worried because the other day our gardener (who has been visiting us over 10 years and knows us) told us she told him “what if the house burnt down”. He told her it would be a great lost and she answered back “but anyways I would have already left”. Now that scared the *s* out of me. Apparently she told him quite sometime but no of Corona he wasn’t coming to our home and only told us after I was chatting with him about her behavior. Right now we can’t send her to an elderly place bc of the virus, but is there anything I can do to besides worrying and looking after her and checking she isn’t doing anything weird??
My mother has Alzheimer's and before the pandemic, I was taking her out everyday to walk around the markets, Costco, Walmart, the mall, etc. When the pandemic first started, I continued to take her out daily, but only for car rides. Now, she wears a mask and goes everywhere like she used to. If I kept her at home, she'd go crazy, crazier than her normal Alz. state.
If your grandmother can't go out, then she's right to feel trapped like a prisoner.
When you go out, wear a mask and keep a distance from people, don't touch your face. It's safe to go out. Beats staying home and destroying your mental and physical health.
thanks for your comment, my mother and grandmother have such a bad relationship and I’m in the middle, I don’t know where to stand. I’ll try talking to my mom and reasoning about taking strolls with masks and at a distance in a safe zone (sadly we are from Mexico were the pandemic has been very out of control, add the fact that she loves cleaning and is very averse to bacteria, viruses and stuff like that. She came to my space and threw away a carpet because “it was so filthy!”. It was just a carpet really).
if she cannot reason I don’t know what to do, I’m not sure I can force her to take therapy though she clearly needs it. 😣
corona and a controlling figure, pufff I do not recommend.
Go to your state's website:
https://covid19.ca.gov/es/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=ca-covid19response-august2020&utm_term=coronavirus&gclid=CjwKCAiArIH_BRB2EiwALfbH1PL_Ampd3n8R_2LmIofPQDpsc22m6ryPtOeMPfLI7D8rNxX9ZtFRrRoCDtQQAvD_BwE
Here is the link for the CDC's website in Spanish:
https://www.cdc.gov/other/language-assistance.html#Spanish
Why are you the caregiver in charge? Your mother has to either get a full time caregiver through health insurance or pay a Home Health Aide. You can also take her to ER & say she’s a danger to herself & other family members. Repeat what she said about burning house down. Talk to Social Worker at hospital about placing her in facility. Grandma needs neurologist to give MRI of brain. It will show if there’s dementia & Alzheimer’s. They can do this in ER too. Or make appointment to go to neurologist with her. There’s medication to control/calm her...Your mother must go with her.
How old are you? Do you work, go to school? Have friends? Being caregiver to grandma shouldn’t be your job. Good luck & hugs 🤗.