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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I acknowledge and authorize
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I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
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I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
My mom talks nice to my other brothers and sisters on the phone but not me. Why is that and she lives with me. She has been living with me for approximately 3-years and she has dementia.
I have no idea why this happens but I can say that it is common behavior for many parents.
My mom lived with me for over a decade. I did everything for her. Yet, there were times when she seemed to favor my brothers who didn’t do anything much for her.
I suppose that she missed them since they didn’t visit her often and was happy to speak to them on the phone or visit with them when they did come by.
I hope that you are taking regular breaks so that you are able to get adequate rest for yourself. Caregiving is one of the toughest jobs ever. It is physically and emotionally exhausting.
I was the scapegoat to my mother, I did most everything for her, my brother visited her once or twice a year, stayed for a few hours and left. At one time he lived 4 miles from her and never visited. Me I lived anywhere between 700-1200 miles away.
He was the Golden Boy. I was nothing to her, her servant.
Well, I had enough, I stopped talking to her 13 years ago, the happiest 13 years of my adult life.
Time to think of you, have your siblings take over, she will not change, it is you who needs to.
Normal. Perfectly normal not ONLY in those with dementia, but for those who are not challenged in any way. Think about it. How nice are you to family you never see much of? And how nice are you to family that lives with you? Hubby, kids, etc.
When you think about it, it is extremely difficult for humans to live with ANYONE, and the closer you are the less inhibited. You will feel more free and honest with family you live with, but you will also take out a bad mood on those closest to you.
So I am calling this common question "that's perfectly normal". You can sing it to the tune of "We always hurt the ones we love, the ones we shouldn't hurt at all".
Sounds like its time for placement. There is an old saying: "Familiarity breeds contempt." Some people realize that they can dish out any behavior and you will still stick around for it.
Three years is long enough. Mom has lived her life. It is time to live yours again.
I hope you'll find a wonderful place for mom to go. She needs to be out of your house.
Dementia is a difficult thing, and caregiving someone with this condition is very difficult. She needs full-time professional caregivers now, and she'll get that somewhere else. Make sure she gets there!
Its because she lives with you. You are the "gate keeper". The one that makes her shower, dress, go to bed, can't go out without you. Her other children do not need to do this. Its the Dementia, in my opinion, they become like a toddler and a toddler does not like being told what to do. You are now the parent and she is the child.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
You need to get the 8 other kids on board, or get Mom placed somewhere. Don't let yourself be trapped. I know how you feel!
Happy Holidays to you, I get it. Time to make a new plan in 2024.
My mom lived with me for over a decade. I did everything for her. Yet, there were times when she seemed to favor my brothers who didn’t do anything much for her.
I suppose that she missed them since they didn’t visit her often and was happy to speak to them on the phone or visit with them when they did come by.
I hope that you are taking regular breaks so that you are able to get adequate rest for yourself. Caregiving is one of the toughest jobs ever. It is physically and emotionally exhausting.
He was the Golden Boy. I was nothing to her, her servant.
Well, I had enough, I stopped talking to her 13 years ago, the happiest 13 years of my adult life.
Time to think of you, have your siblings take over, she will not change, it is you who needs to.
Think about it.
How nice are you to family you never see much of?
And how nice are you to family that lives with you? Hubby, kids, etc.
When you think about it, it is extremely difficult for humans to live with ANYONE, and the closer you are the less inhibited. You will feel more free and honest with family you live with, but you will also take out a bad mood on those closest to you.
So I am calling this common question "that's perfectly normal".
You can sing it to the tune of "We always hurt the ones we love, the ones we shouldn't hurt at all".
Three years is long enough. Mom has lived her life. It is time to live yours again.
Dementia is a difficult thing, and caregiving someone with this condition is very difficult. She needs full-time professional caregivers now, and she'll get that somewhere else. Make sure she gets there!