My mother has Alzheimer's, I'm concerned about the constant employee turnover at her facility and worry about the care she's receiving. I'd like to have her come to my home to live but my mother is wheelchair bound and incontinent, I have lupus so I'd need some help. Does the VA have any programs available to help?
If you're not happy with her current Memory Care facility, doesn't it make much more sense to just be looking for another Memory Care facility, instead of bringing her to your home, where you know good and well you could not handle the physical aspects of her care without round the clock hired help?
It just doesn't seem to make good sense to jeopardize your own health for your mom, when she's only going to get worse. I'm sorry that you feel that bringing her to your home is the only option. There has to be a better answer out there. I hope you find it.
First you need to ascertain whether mom is even eligible for ANY kind of coverage. Then research out doctors, etc., because she will need a primary dr to go to.
I would think long and hard about bringing mom home, even WITH aides, you will be alone a lot with her and just the sheer magnitude of your own health issues may prove just too much for you.
It's been a horrible year and CG's have burned out and left for other professions--or just burned out. Hopefully in the next months we will see a more return to 'normal'.
Read what you wrote: your mom is incontinent, wheelchair bound AND has Alzheimer's. Ane ONE of those conditions is a difficult care situation.
People here are desperately TRYING to get their LO'S INTO facilities.
Other than the turnover of employees--what are your real concerns? Most of all, is mom happy? That should be first on the list. I wouldn't upset the applecart.
Have you spoken about your concerns to the administration at your mom's place? Do you have actual concrete issues of concern, or are you just worrying because of the turnover? Talking to the executive director should be your first step, and if you still aren't satisfied, then I'd agree with funkygrandma and suggest you look into another facility. Just remember, though, that any move -- even to your house -- is very disrupting to dementia patients.
Establishing open, non-confrontational communication with nursing home staff is the best thing you can do to ensure your mom gets excellent care. I'd make the effort to truly understand what's going on at your mom's place before taking any drastic moves like bringing her home, because I guarantee that plan won't last long and there'll be another terrible disruption to your mom's life.
You might also explore what additions or alterations the VA can make to accommodate your mother if she lives with you, but also find out the timeline. It might be awhile before the VA could make repairs or other changes/additions to accommodate your mother's needs.
My father's VA social worker told us that the VA has some volunteers who provide respite care. Unfortunately, there were none in our area.
An acquaintance from my father's church also told us that she works through the county administration to also provide respite care.
The American Legion also provides assistance in qualification and data preparation; they helped us, and it was so much easier and quicker than if I had filled out the sometimes confusing forms myself.