Please respond to this, I am losing my mind. Everyday I get around 4hours of sleep, I provide inhome 24/7 total care. I have two young kids, cannot attend their activities. My grandmother will not talk to me and if she does comment it's to critique. I am 35 and married, my husband is always running the kids around or out with friends. I cannot afford respite care and since none of the family will put up with her, I am alone. This is the only place I feel comradery. I've always been extremely social with an excellent career, but since I moved her in I cannot work. I have tried to stay PRN at the hospital but, I cannot find an aide that is punctual. I exercise for my sanity but just realized that I have lost 42 pounds in two months, how do you not notice that? My hair is falling out and I cannot make myself eat. Watching my gma lick her plate makes me nauseated. I really need to hear from someone, please be kind, I am at the end of my rope. It will be six months before I can get her in a nursing home, and hopefully I can go on the vacation I have had planned for two years. Thank you for listening, I pray for you all daily.
But don't wait until she is placed to take care of yourself. I urge you to see a doctor. The weight loss is especially concerning. Shortly after my husband was diagnosed with dementia I experienced a weight loss like that, too. I had to make myself eat. I lost weight out of proportion to my eating. My doctor treated me for anxiety and was sure my health issues were related to my husband's diagnosis. When I finally went to an ER I was diagnosed with diabetes! No amount of anxiety meds in the world would have fixed by blood sugar problems! It is possible that all your health symptoms are related to your caregiving situation, but it is also possible something else is going on. So, please, get yourself a thorough examination. If hubby has to stay home a half a day so that you can, so be it. Naheaton has some good suggestions for getting through the days of the next few months. But please, please, see your health care provider.
But for these hard times, I suggest calling under the Government Pages in the phone book for your state, the Senior & Disabled services dept, the Veteran's administration if grandma or her husband were ever in the military. She could qualify for services through him for nursing homes, low income pensions, etc. Then call your County Developmentally Disabled Offices as they have phone numbers of special people that do respite care and might even help pay for the care for you. Then call the nearest large hospital and asking for their social worker and talk to them about your situation. Call a counselor from your husband work if it is a benefit of his insurance or just call one from the yellow pages. Call all the Churches, they will help if they can, you don't have to be a member. Get on the phone and remember that it only takes one phone call to put you in touch with the right person that can and will help you. Been there and done all of the above. Peg
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