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SO got called to a residents unit for a so called spill on their balcony.



The spill was the remains of another resident, who had jumped from 10 stories above. The person had fallen through this resident’s glass table, deformed the redwood decking on top of concrete, and his demolished head was in her demolished planter.



So was the first one to see this. He had to guide the cops to that scene and to the penthouse auditorium where lo and behold there’s a walker with a chair squished up nearby with a footprint on it right next to the balcony. And while guiding the cops—there were at least 10 cars there—he encounters the widow who doesn’t know she’s one yet saying that she just went to the store, now her hubs isn’t answering the cell, what is going on.



And then he’s passing through the dining room. No service, but at the end of the hall is the resident whose condo is for now an active crime scene. She’s sitting there all alone, so went over there. She said friends were coming.



I told him to ask the hr director for the e ap number but he won’t do it

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After my mother developed Alzheimer's, at the early stage, she was still sane most of the time. She said she would rather die than live with no memory. I believe her. I would want the same, too, if I were in her shoes.

I believe many people feel the same way. There should be better and humane ways for people to end their lives than jumping off balconies, blowing their brains out or hanging and breaking their necks.
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You asked what other facilities do - I don't think any of the AL level retirement homes here have balconies or functioning windows they have park-like gardens instead, so that would eliminate that risk for those who are suicidal (or confused).
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Fawnby Oct 2022
I've known of residents in assisted or independent living who threw themselves down the service staircase and died. My mother lived there at the time. The residents found out about it by word of mouth but I don't think there was ever official acknowledgment or announcement of any deaths there. It was marketed as a happy place to live out your years, and the only official image that was allowed was how wonderful it was to live there. Mom's best friend (diabetic) lay dead in her apartment for over a week while staff told residents who were worried about her that she was on a trip, even though they could see her car in the parking lot. It was a beautiful and nice place to live, though, with lovely amenities and pleasant employees. You're just going to have suicides and deaths at that age no matter where you go.
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Poor SO!

It sounds as though this place needs some mental health staff.
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PeggySue2020 Oct 2022
Barb, I wish the facility would for once prioritize resident crisis counseling over say one ice cream social. All the residents found out. They were gathered at the base of the building looking up. Some were looking around, you know, in case any part of the man or his possessions had made it to the ground.

About six weeks prior, another man removed much of his head with a gun he had in the storage unit.

The residents deserve to have their own seminar about this. The last thing anyone needs is for suicides to become a trend, especially those that endanger other people.
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So came home three hours early, on request. His director told him that her fellow directors are arranging for crisis counselors for residents AND staff plus he, so, will not be involved in the deck cleanup.

They stressed that a jumping had not happened in the 35 years since inception.

However, the protracted stage of senior decline has elongated. The more operations and procedures one has to avoid the terminal exit, the longer one stays on the road to either immobility or dementia.

No one wants to deal with that reality.
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When my mom was diagnosed with MCI, I read 40% of MCI patients go on to have some form of dementia AND that elevated patios were a bad idea. My "dream house" also had a river in the backyard; so even though it was single level living, it was not ideal for Mom's living. So I moved to a single level house next door to my nephew so (among other considerations) we could enjoy Mom's great-grandchildren.

I wonder if some signs of early dementia could also be a contributing factor in high rise deaths.
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Balconies are not good for dementia patients especially when their visual/spatial skills are affected. They will become unable to judge the depth, or distance of a bulding, street, steps or even a bathtub for that matter.

This is a horrible thing to read about someone falling from off a balcony and dying.
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If someone suffers from certain types of dementia or Lewy Body syndrome, they can have hallucinations which may drive them to suicide. Or depression. Remember Robin Williams hung himself due to his Parkinson's diagnosis and symptoms. I suppose this type of suicide is a unique occurrence at multi-level facilities... so sorry that your SO had to suffer this horrible event.
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The resident not being checked on is outrageous. They have keys to these apts/rooms. If she hasn't been seen, then someone needs to check.

We need "unlike" buttons as well has "like".
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PeggySue2020 Oct 2022
So saw the man about an hour before he committed suicide. He seemed down, but within the normal range.

As far as his facility, they have motion detectors in all units. If a resident hasn’t checked herself out, someone goes to check on her within 24 hours.
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