My dad's caregiver who also lives at his house (she's not 24/7 however) wants to have friends or her partner over whenever she likes.
The only issue I have is that he has not yet had the vaccine (nor has she) and he is a high-risk population.
I don't live in the state so it wasn't until the other caregiver made me aware of this that I sent an email to let her know she can't have guests over.
Now she is very upset and sending me long messages in protest.
Do you think it's unreasonable to ask her to not have guests until he is vaccinated and his doctor gives clearance?
Even if or when the caregiver is vaccinated she should not have guests over. This is not her home. This is her place of work and your dad’s home.
You are focused on her vaccinated status but what about her guests? What about the guests family? While it may be more difficult to get COVID-19 after doing vaccinated there is the possibility to still get one of the newer strains and you can still transmit the virus
When she is not working she can go visit her partner, her friends.
Is this caregiver paid legally as an employee? How is her salary handled? Is she a tenant where part of her payment is room and board?
If not set up legally with an agreement and taxes etc withheld, you may be opening a can of worms unless done legally. She could file a complaint with the state department of labor.
If there is question about legality of the situation, contact an elder law attorney.
The value of 24/7 care in my area is around 12k a month. You have a second caregiver from the sounds of it. Good. Does dad have 24/7 care with two caregivers? Does tenant have freedom to do what she wants always when not on duty? Or is she expected to tend to dad's needs when not on the clock?
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/protecting-senior-from-covid-with-caregiver-457911.htm?orderby=oldest
Not saying I am correct, just giving you what I have gotten from discussions on the forum.
Now if the person is not being paid legally (with deductions etc.) that is a separate subject.
Obviously she should not have guests when she is on the clock but, her off duty time is hers to do with as she pleases.
If you can not trust her to not bring someone that is obviously sick into the house, then you can't trust her to take care of your dad and you should start eviction proceedings.
I do believe that it is illegal to withhold payroll to cover rent. It bypasses taxes and insurances, effecting her long term benefits from SS.
If you want the control to keep everyone but caregivers out of the house then you have to do it correctly and get 3 shifts. Sorry but, when you are fudging things this is the fallout.
If it is not in the rental agreement, all you can do is ask.
If the rental agreement is month to month, you can change it in writing with appropriate notice, but what tenant would pay market rent with those kind of restrictions on use?
Here is a link on applying an employee's room and board to the minimum wage requirements. https://www.dol.gov/agencies/whd/direct-care/credit-wages/faq
Should they then be allowed to use clients kitchen & bathroom?
The main point of having a caregiver is for the client’s safety.
In this line of work (especially with live-in help) families often make the mistake, and it's an honest mistake in most cases, of thinking that the caregiver's sole reason for living is to serve the needs of their loved one. It's important for people to not forget that being a paid caregiver is a job. I should know having done this work for almost 25 years. When I'm on the clock a family can trust that their LO will be well taken care of. They can trust that client's home and possessions will also be treated with respect and well cared for. When I'm off the clock that's when my work day ends. I will not take phone calls from clients or their families after my work hours are done. It automatically goes to voicemail. I listen to the messages and call back at my discretion if it's something important that I need to know to do my job.
If a family has good help that works well with their LO, don't come at us with the 'I'm in control' approach because this is what the most likely outcome will be. The caregiver will quit the client and go. Now in a situation like the one sunnybrooke has, the person 'in control' is out-of-state and the caregiver is a live-in. If she goes then a new one willing to live there will have to be found. Probably a stranger that the father and family don't know. Who knows how the father will get along with them? We don't have slavery or an indentured bond servants anymore so the family can't just go and buy someone then simply command them to make their LO's care their entire life.
Better to not take such an approach with with the help. Maybe a bit of compromise will work better for everyone.
How many hours a day is she expected to work and does it happen to be the night time hours? If she is paid to work X number hours a day and is paid partly in cash and partly in free room - then there should not be visitors during her work hours. It's the same as you being at work in the office and your friends/partner dropping by for several hours a day. You wouldn't be employed long - you're paid for your 8 hrs a day. If she has the night shift with your dad, is she to be available as he needs things during the night? Or does she have tasks she is supposed to do for an 8 hr shift at night. First, sort out what she is supposed to be doing, how much you pay her with money and room, if those two things determine her pay.
If she gets a room in exchange for just being in the house with him, then she needs to be available to run when he calls. You can't, however, give a person a residence to live in and then exclude them from having company. You can make all people coming/going mask up, glove up and use lots of hand sanitizer. Even this person should be doing that when she is in close contact to dad. Especially if she goes out among other people.
The vaccine is probably NOT going to prevent everyone from getting it. More than likely, in my opinion, it will be like the flu - you may still get it but not a serious event. The doctor is never going to give clearance for people to just come and go. Guests need to respect dad's underlying medical issues and wear a mask when they enter from only God knows where. Keep in mind there are plenty of people in the medical field who do not mask up around others when they aren't at work - anyone can bring it into the home. To protect dad, you need protocol in place and everyone follows it or they don't come in. Include taking a temp - all supplies near an entrance and everyone uses them.
If there is a separate entrance far away from dad's areas, guests could use that and maintain distance from him. You can tell her no friends and then you push her to be away from the house to see friends. Weigh your options. Might be time to hire in=home healthcare people and end the live in arrangement.
I think your best bet is to communicate with her so there isn't any misunderstandings. You trust her enough to live in your father's house and take care of him, so there won't be a problem with the two of you talking this over.
I expect it's different - it must be different! - where your dad lives, but here it's the law: no mixing of households. Not 'til... whenever it is. I've got so confused by the timetable for "lockdown easing" that I'm just bumbling on and assuming I will never be allowed to meet anyone socially ever again :(
But your father is (presumably) in an older age group and shielding, neither he nor the caregiver has been vaccinated, and it is OUT OF THE QUESTION that anybody crosses their threshold without a valid reason for being there. Party party party does not constitute even one valid reason.
What's her beef? I'm genuinely curious, I'd love to know what she thinks is unfair about this.
We are allowed to have guests in our home, Governor is asking for small gatherings and common sense.
You can not legally do what this family is doing, so they need to make serious changes or face big problems when this caregiver tenant goes to the authorities and complains about not being paid or being unjustly evicted.
This is a poster child for why we deal with employees per the law of the land. Really the employee has all the power because of the way things have been handled in this situation.
All this talk about slavery in this contact is nonsense. The employee is an at-will employee and can be fired or discharged for any reason. Employers can set whatever conditions they like. If the employee doesn’t like the rules, they are free to find another job.
Don’t bend on the rules and check to see what rental law says where you live. If there is no written rental agreement then don’t sign one now. Maybe the worker will get mad enough to quit, make a threat, or do something that justifies termination of employment. Then consult a lawyer - there are inexpensive services on line - to be sure any future hiring or rental agreements are properly worded to protect you and your parent.
Our housekeeper has a legal contract that meets federal wage and hour laws and applicable state laws. It illegal to give room and board without appropriate pay. It is considered slavery to not provide pay. She has paid vacation, holidays off, health insurance and other employer paid benefits. She has taxes and Social Security withheld and we pay the workers comp, employer portion of social security, and unemployment insurance.
Our housekeeper is a good employee and we trust her completely. Treating employees well results in good employees and a pleasant home. We have a monthly meeting discuss any issues and to set the schedule if either of us has appointments that need to be accommodated. The
You can not dictate what an employee does on their own time.
You can not rent someone a home and dictate how they utilize the space that they pay for, after the fact. Obviously bringing a business into a residential space would be pushing the limits of zoning and can be stopped. She wants to tell a renter that she can not have anyone over to visit, including her partner.
My 98 mom has a live in caregiver who was there only because there had to be someone there 24/7. Nurses/aides would go there every day for 8 hours/day and this caregiver would go out every day & see her family, etc. and occasionally have her granddaughter & daughter at the house. She lives in the basement but there is only 1 bathroom, 1 kitchen all upstairs.
Fast forward to Dec31........my mom caught covid from her & almost died. She still hasn’t been able to come home & the woman is still living in her home & entertaining family there.
Until his doctor gives clearance there should be no unnecessary visitors in his home. His safety should be the main concern.
As an FYI ....my brother is the one with DPOA who made all these decisions & not me.
I suppose a lot might depend on the wording... Sunbrooke, when you "sent the email to let her know she can't have guests over" what exactly did you say?
There is also the point that there is another caregiver present, one who was at least annoyed enough to tell the employer about the visitors. It's not unreasonable either to expect your co-workers to behave responsibly, or to ask your employer to protect your wellbeing by making your workplace as Covid-secure as possible.
This is not her work place 24/7, yet the family is trying to dictate her actions as though it were. You can't have it both ways. She didn't ask, she informed her that she could not have guests over.
She pays rent to live there, that makes it her legal residence, meaning that she can have visitors. She can not be told that she can not have visitors.
How do they know what the other caregiver is doing on her time off? She could be behaving badly and is a total risk of bringing the virus into the house hold and infecting her client.
Quite frankly, if the family is concerned about exposure then they need to provide PPE. Have a protocol for what is expected before entering the home and what is expected while in the home around dad. In the tenants private quarters, they have no say because she pays rent.
One of the problems that I see is that you have one employee accusing another and nobody to verify if any of it is true. This situation is a boiling cauldron in my opinion. Who wants to work with anyone that "tells" on you and you are reprimanded for their report by a boss that is not around.
I would rather have the partner coming over then have my caregiver who knows where with who knows who. Just my opinion.
Would you even think about renting a place where the landlord told you that outside visitors are not allowed? Or you are not permitted to leave the room?
So, the caregiver was living with her boyfriend and now is live in with you, correct? When she did not live in your home, you contacted her boyfriend about CDC guidlines and tried to dictate his life. You overstepped major boundaries and had no right contacting him.
So, based on those actions, you would not be able to claim a room and board credit or "rent" because CG lodging is for the employer (your) benefit not the employee.
So, you do not want boyfriend to come to dad's house. Does that mean you are okay if she goes back to his apartment during her time off? If not, you are violating alot of labor laws and owe CG quite a bit in back wages.
Because I can't for the life of me figure out where someone in a different state gets this kind of information.
Would you even think about renting a place where the landlord told you that outside visitors are not allowed? Or you are not permitted to leave the room?