Today was the first time this has happened and sister says it happened twice. Mom was startled both times. Second time mom said, "How'd you do that?"
Attempts to get cognitive diagnosis have failed, so no dx. Dementia of some kind. CT scans show diffuse atrophy normal for age (79). Three unruptured aneurysms which have grown in 4 years. Dolichoectasia. Moderate small vessel disease.
I would call Moms doctor. I would also getbher out of independent living and into an AL.
And on a side note, your profile says that you "hate" being your moms caregiver, so I do hope and pray that you are not her full-time caregiver, as everyone deserves someone to care for them that doesn't hate what they're doing.
I know that caregiving is hard, trust me I know all too well, and not everyone is cut out to be one, so I hope your time with your mom is very limited at this point and that she has others looking after her that don't hate it quite as much.
We are not medical professionals. People can guess about what happened. That’s about all.
You need to speak to your mom’s doctor about these questions.
Wishing you all the best.
I have never seen what you describe happen, but my husband began acting like he could not see things. When I would hand an item to him, he would grasp in the air nearby. This did not happen all the time but enough I made an appointment with his neuro-opthalmologist. When the tech was screening him he did not seem to be able to see much at all. I even went up to the wall, pointed at the Big E and he said he could not see it. The doctor came in and examined his eyes. He said there was nothing wrong with his eyes (physically) but his brain was not "processing" what he was seeing. Since then I have found that to be true from time to time. I have also noticed it with his hearing at times. I can make him look straight at me and he still stares with a blank stare when I ask a question and I have to nudge him to get an answer. Thankfully, these are still random occurrences and I am having to learn a new level of patience.
As far as a cognitive diagnosis, as AlvaDeer suggested, the best specialist I have found is a neuro-psychologist. If she has not seen one yet, it may be worth the drive if there is not one local. Before going, ask if the doctor will give you some first impressions after the evaluation while you are there, if not keep looking. The first evaluation my husband had, we were told nothing before we left. A report was sent to our neurologist who did not explain much at all. The next neuro-psychologist, who evaluated him, called me in when she finished the testing. She shared basic info as to what she felt was going on and suggestions how to care for him. She then sent a report to his neurologist and one to us as well.
Now what you need is neuro-psyc testing with actual tests to test cognitive levels to decide what safety levels are.
This isn't called attempts at diagnosis failing, but rather not following up with the testing you need in order to assess her safety and ability to function on her own (or not).
You need neuro-psyc eval; get referral from her MD for cognitive testing.
As to this jumping who knows. She has dementia almost certainly or an overactive anxiety and startle reflex? Who could know such a thing? Your guess is as good as ours, and in fact better as you know her overall reactions on a daily basis and we can have no idea of that.
I agree with funkygrandma, if you hate caregiving and aren’t able to handle the situation then that’s another issue for you to address.
Like Funkygrandma says, your mother needs someone who will be her advocate to see that she receives care.
Wishing you and your mother all the best.
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