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Has anyone been here? Is it best to find an independent rep who can do the research for me? I have paid $100,000's up to this point and I have reached my limit. My mother gets $2200 in SS each month. She has no other income or assets. I don't claim her as a dependent. She has dementia/Alzheimer's, incontinence, uses a walker. She lives with my brother, and caregivers come into the home 12 hours a day. I need help navigating!!!!

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Call your Office of Aging and ask if they can help. Its a matter of applying for Medicaid in home care or Medicaid LTC. Mom needs to meet their criteria. Differs from State to State. In my state, she is under the 2300 cap.

You should also have a Social Service Office where Medicaid caseworkers are. They may be able to help.

Other than Medicaid, not sure if you can get any other help concerning free care. O of A may have aides or know ofvother resources.
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Your mother should be in a nursing facility paid my Medicaid unless you want to continue to pay in home care givers or want to pay for an assisted living facility for her. Those to my knowledge are the only options. You can apply her for long term Medicaid online usually. There should be a website that her State has online with the application. After you fill it out a caseworker will contact you. Maybe your State has Medicaid waivers for assisted living as well, or possibly in home assistance, but for me I only had a skilled nursing facility as an option. You will also need her physician to qualify her for long term care as well.
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Contact a well regarded lawyer who specializes in Elder Care, it's worth the consultation fee.
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Don't do that!! Don't give up the security of your future to pay for mom's care when Uncle Sam will pick up the tab. Have you not applied for Medicaid for your mom? For the amount you have already spent, you could have placed her in an ALF or MC facility. Apply for Medicaid for her.
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worriedinCali Jan 2021
Uh what? Don’t do what? The OP IS trying to get Uncle Sam to pay.....where does the OP say anything that would leave you to think she’s giving up her secure future? She’s trying to her mother on government assistance...
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Get a good pool trust company. Check out the legit ones on your area. They have an up front fee, then usually 10% monthly charge. They take her extra income and put it into an account. This then allows her to qualify for medicaid as secondary to her medicare. Check each state as this is NY State. From there you choose a long term medical insurance as her secondary. Medicaid nurse comes in to do an assessment to see her state of mind and what she qualifies for. Then the long term insurance company comes and does an assessment. It is tedious, but once all set up they will pay Dr bills after medicare, so no more copays and they pay for durable medical equipment needed and even caretakers that you hire and set up through CDPAP program.
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LakeErie Jan 2021
?? What on earth is a pool trust company??
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You might consult with an Aging Life Specialist. We hired one with 30 years experience as a Social Worker. She knew what was available to us in the area and was a very big help.

If hiring someone is outside of your budget (it was about $125 an hour for her help) the county often has Social Workers who will evaluate your situation and offer guidance. There was a very long wait for help in the county in which our person lived, though.

We found the names of aging life specialists in our area on aginglifecare.org
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Actually, your mom makes too much money to be on medicaid.
Medicare doesn't pay for Caregiving.
So, all you can do is let her continue living with brother using Caregivers.

you might consider a Live In if your brother has a spare Bedroom for the Live In.

if you check around, you can find someone for $500 a week plus Room and Board.
The only other thing is to find a Senior Home for her to live in that will accept her Social Security amount.

Tho the best option and the happiest would be to allow her to continue living where she is.

Prayers
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mstrbill Jan 2021
Mom makes too much for community Medicaid but not for long term nursing home Medicaid if she needs it. Mom can be placed in a NH covered by LTC Medicaid. The problem with allowing mom to continue to live where she is is OP apparently can't afford it anymore. She's stated she's already spent $100,000's and can't afford it anymore.
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In Florida, you really have no options unless you have nursing home insurance. Medicaid will NOT pay for sitters, and Medicare has limitations with regard to home health aides. Medicaid only pays for two things: (1) Adult daycare, and (2) nursing home.

And be mindful Medicaid has an estate recovery law so whatever goes into probate, Medicaid and potentially seize after your loved one dies.

As for Aide & Attendance through the VA...if her overall income is $2200 a month she probably makes too much money to qualify. They also include household income. That is a highly complex quagmire of legal mumbo-jumbo just as bad--if not worse--than Medicaid.
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SynergyNJ Jan 2021
If she is the surviving spouse of a wartime veteran with $2200/mo in income and no other real assets (house and car are excluded from the eligibility formula), she SHOULD qualify for the Aid and Attendance pension benefit. This benefit could pay for up to 40 hours/month of home care.
A 3rd party service like 'Veteran's Home Care' can easily determine if going through the application process is worthwhile or not.
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My mom was able to age in place in Ohio with a combination of Medicaid caregivers and private pay caregivers. However, she had a very small SS pension check. It took a lot of pursuing by my sister to get all the criteria met for mom, but it was worth it. Start with your local Council on Aging agency. They have a wealth of knowledge and can help you determine your options based on your state.
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When you have reached your limit on donating to her care, you have reached your limit. If she is living in the house with a brother and requiring 12 hr a day care, it is obviously over and above what your brother can do as well. It may be time to place her in a facility so she can get round the clock care.

Talk with brother and mom's doctor about Plan B. I doubt you are going to find and financial programs to do more to keep her in the house w/brother. Applying for Medicaid to help to pay for her NH bed is probably the next step. However, you need medical necessity documentation from her doctor to do that.
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I went to an Elder Care Attorney and had a 1 hour consultation that was worth every cent of the $250 fee. I did the paper work and eventually got my wife into the Medicade program with 12 hours of in home care spread over 3 days of my choosing. i use my caregivers to prepare and serve dinner, change my wife's incontinence diapers, some minor cleaning, sponge bathing, etc.. If you are up tight as a Caregiver, see your doctor. He can help.
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Usually, long term care insurance will pay for home health care aides - and it is expensive. Health insurance will not pay for long term care home health assistance. Since your mother requires 12 hours of paid care every day and she is on SS, it appears time to place her in a memory care unit. Please research memory care units that will accept medicaid and medicare. If the paperwork seems too daunting to fill in for medicaid, consult with a lawyer who specializes in elder law. Their office can assist you or point you to someone that can.
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Imho, your kind donation to her care must now end. It never was your financial responsibility.
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If your mom's monthly income of $2200 exceeds your state's limit for Medicaid, you can look into a Miller Trust. Funds paid into the Trust will eventually be turned over to Medicaid. Find an elder care atty in your state who is familiar with the process.
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Your mom gets 2200 a month so what are her expenses? You have Part B, prescriptions, etc. It does not matter what goes in only that it is less the amount after expenses and the bank balance is less than the amount per your state.

So, the dr can order a SW to navigate programs and help with the paperwork.
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Yout mom should be eligible for Medicaid.
Choose a nursing home that accepts Medicaid and talk to the Social Worker there. If your mom’s income & assets are that simple, the paperwork shouldn’t be too complicated.
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Get in touch with a good Elder Attorney and they should be able to help.  Why did you pay so much money and what was it for?  if for your parent(s) you should be using their money for caregivers, etc.  She could be eligible for Medicaid at some point, but you really need to contact an Elder Attorney, it is well worth the money.  good luck
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Sorry I'm late to your question. You need a way to discover all of your options on paying for her care. 1st issue is, Can she stay at home? If so, you'll find that the least expensive. If not, then you're looking for the right place (maybe not the closest) that will accept her with any benefits she may be able to get. Best first stop for you may be a lawyer member of Life Care Planning Law Firm Association. They work nationwide and provide an holistic approach to helping family caregivers. Good luck!
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