My mother is 87 years old she lives above us with my 31 year old son recovering from leukemia. She has always smoked but when in the hospital can go periods of time without. Yesterday she fell asleep with a cigarette somehow in her bed and it caught fire. I am so angry. I told her she could no longer smoke I will get her an electronic cigarette or vapor. Do you think this is too harsh? I love my mom but I don't want to lose a home either. In the past she is also left the gas on the stove on.
If Mom is resistant to quitting, you cannot force her. Even to take her to her doctor for the Patch or pills won’t work unless she wants to quit. Vaping may work and it may not.
I don't think this is “too harsh”. Taking her cigarettes away and not replacing them, in essence making her go “cold turkey” may seem cruel, but you’re doing it for everyone’s safety. After a few days, she may be agreeable to the Patch or pills but be aware that health insurance doesn’t cover the entire cost of stop smoking aides.
Again, Mom may need more supervision than she already has. If gas was left on and her dropped cigarette caused a fire, the entire building could explode. Your son may not be able to provide the supervision she needs during his recovery. You may want to consider a health aide.
It is not too harsh, you are not being too harsh. No smoking is the natural consequence of becoming a danger to yourself or others.
If she wants to smoke, she can choose a facility that will accept smoking residents, starting with Assisted Living, but does she require more assistance than that?
While your decisions on her and your families behalf are not too harsh, you could try and muster up the rare skill to not be angry towards her. It sounds like her decline is a broken brain, and not in her power to control. Instead, you could continue to vent here, keep coming back for support, your anger is purely justified, so tell us. Welcome! So, Werallone, No guilt; No enabling her to continue to smoke; and support for your difficult times ahead. Others will be here to help support you soon.
One Juul electronic cigarette has the same punch as a pack of cigarettes. Therefore, if your Mom uses three refillable inserts per day, that would contains the same nicotine as 3 packs of cigarettes. The vapors are not without risk to your son.
One has to be extremely careful with the re-charging unit. These units have been known to catch fire if left on too long.