What I'm asking is the following:
What does the nursing home do, what does the family do, and what does the funeral home do? I'm just trying to understand what will need to be done and by whom when the inevitable happens. I am fortunate that this is my first time, so I have no experience. I am my mother's only child, so it's all up to me.
Any insights are appreciated; thank you in advance.
My mom is on Medicaid in a nursing home in North Carolina. Does the nursing home notify Medicaid that she has passed, or is that something I have to do?
I am her SSA rep payee, but her check is direct-deposited to the nursing home. Will they return any direct deposits if needed?
I read somewhere that most funeral homes will notify SSA, and SSA will notify Medicare, so I'm pretty sure once I share her SSN, they'll handle it (but of course, I will ask).
What about the VA? She is receiving survivors' benefits, and I am her fiduciary. I know I will have to contact the local fiduciary hub, but I'm unsure if they will notify the rest of the VA? I also have a VA Advocate at our local veterans aid office, I'm sure I can reach out to him as well.
OH, and her health insurance company... she has an Advantage plan, so that must be taken care of.
And there's the company that handles a small pension she gets from her deceased husband's employer. Those checks also go to the nursing home, but they are not directly deposited.
As to imminent death, if your loved one is on Hospice care then they will guide you and can even guide you in choosing a reputable funeral establishment. In my brother's case he wanted simple cremation and no services.
Call funeral homes in your area and feel free to explore. Let them know what she would want in terms of services and DO NOT get roped into any pre-need nonsense. Just ask to be reassured they will accept her for the services you/she wishes to have.
As to death and what happens, call the admins at your establishment. Most often the person dies, the coroner or the doctor is called to "pronounce death". If there's a recent fall sometimes there is coroner request for autopsy. You would be notified as next of kin. You would be asked for the name of your preferrred establishment.
As to SS and all of that, yes, the Funeral Establishment notifies them.
You should notify at least one credit agency, either transunion, equifax or the other I cannot think of at the moment. They will notify the other.
You are, if you are speaking of someone on Medicaid, not going likely to have to even file probate. But this is all to be decided after death.
There is a good small book (and likely many others) through Amazon called "Please don't die but if you DO die what do I do next?" (
Amazon
https://www.amazon.com/Please-Dont-Die…
Please Don't Die, But if You Do, What Do I Do Next?: …
Jun 19, 2012 · Please Don't Die, But if You Do, What Do I Do Next?: A Practical and Cost Saving Guide for the Estate Executor [Grube, Kurt J., Grube Esq., Keith S., Nevola, John E.] on Amazon.com. *FREE* shipping on qualifying offers.
It will have answers to many of your questions and is inexpensive.
When Mom was admitted to her NH, it was then they were told what Funeral home she would be going to. The day she passed, she was on Hospice, I had visited and left 20 min before she was declared. When I got the call I told them to call the funeral home and they went and got Mom. By law, the Funeral Home has to notify Social Security of the death. When SS is notified, so is Medicare. Medicaid is notified by the Nursing Home. You may need to call a former employer about any pension and benefits she may receive from them. I was Executor too but, that really is not in effect until Probate excepts the Executor and they are given a short certificate to handle the estate. That cannot happen until a few days after death.
Even though her pension check goes directly to the NH, you need to call the employer to stop payment. Same thing with the Advantage plan, you need to tell them she passed. I suggest you make a list and check the names off as you do it.
First, it was pretty clear that he wouldn't be with us much longer. He was in a shared room at the time, and they moved his roommate to another room (two-fold - for family privacy, but also so that his roommate didn't have to live in the room as it was happening)
They called the local family in, and even offered to make space for us to spend the night if needed (he was over an hour away, so the thought was sweet, but we did just end up going back and forth over the next few days)
During his last week or so, the nursing home confirmed our funeral home of choice.
When he passed, I believe this is the order it occurred. He was pronounced. Then we were notified. The Funeral Home was contacted. And then they called us back to let us know what time the funeral home would arrive to transport him.
As the timeline was pretty tight- only DH, myself and our youngest daughter (college age) were able to get up there to meet them - it was NOT a requirement though. We went because we wanted to be there for a special event that the VA home does for veterans who have passed away. They call it the Honor Walk We waited in the lobby of the SNF. The funeral home attendant prepared him and covered his body on the gurney, and draped it with an American flag. He was on the 2nd floor, so they had to take the elevator down, but residents (who were able to) and staff line the halls and saluted or had their hands over their hearts as the National Anthem was played. Once he reached the lobby, they did a small bio about him over the intercom and then asked every one for a moment of silence. Then they played "Taps" as the funeral home attendant took him out to their transport vehicle.
Had it not been for that - we wouldn't have even have needed to be there for them to transport. The funeral home would have handled it all.
The next day we met at the funeral home and made all of the arrangements. I believe when they file for the death certificates as part of the arrangements that triggers some of the official notifications. We didn't have to notify SS or the VA. We almost immediately saw SS and VA payments that had gone into his account pulled back out (within days). His bank account was also locked down within days. So I'm fairly certain that his social security number was flagged when we requested death certificates and the county received those requests. (It was a pretty quick update).
Our arrangements came with 10 death certificates. We didn't end up needing more, because some places just wanted scanned copies and emails, some just wanted copies and others wanted the originals. In some cases we could get them to provide the original back
As Geaton said, the executor of the estate takes over. As soon as we had the death certificates, DH immediately filed the will and got his Letters of Testamentary so that he could begin handling the estate.
If the appropriate agencies are NOT notified though through the end of life process with the NH and FH, I would think the executor would handle those notifications. But they will need the appropriate paperwork to prove they are allowed to do that in most cases.
How this could happen? When my mom died, credit cards sent notices (with condolences) about money owed without me even notifying them.
Upon his 2 am passing, the nursing home contacted me and provided me time to get there and have some private time with him. They had asked for our funeral home preference when he was admitted. They contacted them when I left the facility. The funeral home took care of contacting Social Security and Medicare. I had to contact the pension company and the Worker’s Compensation people, providing them with a death certificate. The death certificates are done through the funeral home also, and they were taking 10 days at that time. So, just know that you don't have to hurry. Once SS stopped his direct deposit, the Bank knew of his passing and freezes the account. I was listed as a signatory on his account, but not as a joint owner. So, the funds had to be transferred to his estate account.
As for his items at the nursing home, they allowed me plenty of time to pick up what I wanted. Anything we didn't want they distributed to other residents or saved for their annual sale to their employees. I do know that is not the case at all facilities, especially if the resident is on Medicaid. These beds are usually in high demand and clearing out the rooms as quickly as possible is important, so they can get someone else in the room. Seems insensitive, but facilities are a business with many expenses that need to be paid.( I have also worked at a senior living business, so I know firsthand.)
I can't advise on the VA items as my Dad was not a veteran.
Feel free to reach out if you have any questions. I am still going through the process, and learning as I go. Fortunately, I have an attorney handling the estate to keep me on track.
Once the body is out of the building, funeral home takes over. You'll only hear from facility for business matters and to remove any belongings. As far as notifying goes, once the SSN is noted as belonging to a deceased person, it is a domino affect with anything that the number was used for will be notified (credit cards, Social Security, VA, etc). Notices will be sent regarding the deceased, (usually with condolences mentioned).
That's mostly it in a nutshell.
See All Answers