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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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Her dad died yrs ago. For 4yrs she's failed to keep up property taxes, HOA & abandoned. Her assets are 2 million & I know I can help her, but don't know how to when she's isolated herself & has both parents ashes with her next to bed..help
You should see a lawyer and he will assist you in seeking guardianship either by yourself or by the state. Does she have diagnosed mental illness or dementia that you know of? How old is she?
OP's profile says her mother is 70 yrs old and is in a "toxic" "abusive" relationship:
"...involved in a relationship that is abusive mentally & hasn't had any medical visits..no doctor & her fathers properties are in serious jeopardy & has abandoned all finance decisions in property she lives & fathers home..property taxes delinquent on both property's..unable to communicate to me & her relationship is toxic & is being isolated from me & he too has elderly parent & is isolating his mother from 2 other siblings..he is not protecting her or helping her & is emotionally abusive & controls with threats that keep him in control of all she does! "
First question is...Does she WANT your help and does she NEED help? If she does not want your help then back off. Why get yourself into a situation where she will be angry and you will be frustrated that she is abusive or refuses your help. If she NEEDS help will she accept help from you? If not then another family member should step in. If there are none or they do not want to for ANY reason then let the State take over and she can have a Court Appointed Guardian and they can make all the decisions for her. (not sure if the family would want that if her assets are what you say they are.) Or you become her Guardian and place her in a facility where she will be cared for. Her assets will go to pay for her care, any remaining when she passes will go to heirs. (I do suggest that you talk to an Elder Care Attorney before making any decisions.)
If she is not declared incompetent there really is nothing you can do. Other than getting the situation on the radar of the authorities.
Are you sure she can actually afford the property tax on this real estate? Sometimes people forget that just because you have expensive real estate doesn't mean that you have 2 dimes to rub together, she could be cash poor.
If these properties are important to you then I suggest that you speak to the assessors office and find out how you can buy them and put them in your name before they go to auction for delinquent taxes. It is getting close to the time so you should start before it gets to a point of no return and it will if it is not dealt with.
The person with whom she has a relationship, her husband, partner, boyfriend?
That makes more than 'just us two'. If she chooses the relationship over you, then you have an uphill legal battle.
If he is toxic/abusive and also isolating his own mother from his two siblings, that is elder abuse. Get together with his siblings to stop this criminal act by calling on APS.
There is, at the very least, financial abuse by not keeping up his fiduciary responsibilities to your mother. imo.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
"...involved in a relationship that is abusive mentally & hasn't had any medical visits..no doctor & her fathers properties are in serious jeopardy & has abandoned all finance decisions in property she lives & fathers home..property taxes delinquent on both property's..unable to communicate to me & her relationship is toxic & is being isolated from me & he too has elderly parent & is isolating his mother from 2 other siblings..he is not protecting her or helping her & is emotionally abusive & controls with threats that keep him in control of all she does! "
If she does not want your help then back off. Why get yourself into a situation where she will be angry and you will be frustrated that she is abusive or refuses your help.
If she NEEDS help will she accept help from you? If not then another family member should step in. If there are none or they do not want to for ANY reason then let the State take over and she can have a Court Appointed Guardian and they can make all the decisions for her. (not sure if the family would want that if her assets are what you say they are.) Or you become her Guardian and place her in a facility where she will be cared for. Her assets will go to pay for her care, any remaining when she passes will go to heirs. (I do suggest that you talk to an Elder Care Attorney before making any decisions.)
If she is not declared incompetent there really is nothing you can do. Other than getting the situation on the radar of the authorities.
Are you sure she can actually afford the property tax on this real estate? Sometimes people forget that just because you have expensive real estate doesn't mean that you have 2 dimes to rub together, she could be cash poor.
If these properties are important to you then I suggest that you speak to the assessors office and find out how you can buy them and put them in your name before they go to auction for delinquent taxes. It is getting close to the time so you should start before it gets to a point of no return and it will if it is not dealt with.
That makes more than 'just us two'. If she chooses the relationship over you, then you have an uphill legal battle.
If he is toxic/abusive and also isolating his own mother from his two siblings, that is elder abuse. Get together with his siblings to stop this criminal act by calling on APS.
There is, at the very least, financial abuse by not keeping up his fiduciary responsibilities to your mother. imo.
Mom is competent and that makes her fully responsible.